Professor Farnsworth Quotes
Farnsworth: I was a fool to think you'd changed, you old bat!
Mom: Filthy, toothless nerd bastard!
Farnsworth: Damned she-fossil!
Mom: Stink pig!
I was out fleeing some robots and the silvery moonlight glinting off their bloody claws made me think of you.
Igner: But if the glasses man makes up with Mommy, she'll be happy and stop the scary robots.
Farnsworth: Make up with her? After she went all psycho when I thought everything was cool?
I'm ready to seduce. I'm wearing my kissing dentures and my evening truss.
Walt: For this demonstration, I have placed one of Mother's bras on Igner. The robot controller is nestled here in the left cup.
Farnsworth: Never fear. My magic fingers still know how to do their stuff!
Amy: The Professor can't walk all the way to the Bronx. How are we gonna get there without a hover-car?
Fry: Wait! In my time we had a way of moving things long distances without hovering.
Hermes: Impossible!
Fry: It was called... let me think. It was really famous - Ruth Gordon had one. The wheel!
Leela: Never heard of it.
Farnsworth: Show us this "the wheel".
Good news! There's a report on TV with some very bad news.
Farnsworth: HEY! Unless this is a nude love-in, get the hell off my property!
Free Waterfall, Jr.: You can't own property, man!
Farnsworth: I can, but that's because I'm not a penniless hippie!
Bender: Who wants dolphin?
Leela: Dolphin? But dolphins are intelligent.
Bender: Not this one. He blew all his money on instant lottery tickets.
Fry: OK.
Leela: Oh, OK.
Amy: That's different.
Farnsworth: Good, good.
Leela: Pass the blowhole.
Amy: Can I have a fluke?
Hermes: Hey, quit hogging the bottle-nose.
Farnsworth: Toss me the speech centre of the brain!
Farnsworth: A toast to Leela. She showed us it's wrong to eat certain things.
Fry: Hear, hear!
Bender: Let's get drunk!
Leela: Aww, thanks, guys. Pass the veal, please.
Bender: Here you go.
Fry: Mmm, let me get some of that suckling pig.
Leela: We haven't thought of a name yet.
Bender: They're tasty, right? Let's call 'em "Tasty-cles".
Amy: Ew!
Farnsworth: No!
Leela: We can't call them that.
Bender: Why not?
Leela: It sounds too much like those frozen rocky mountain oysters on a stick. You know, Test-cicles?
Bender: Well, I'm off to work at the restaurant. One of you will have to fill in for me while I'm gone.
Farnsworth: Better yet, I'll build someone to fill in for you. Some kind of gamma-powered mechanical monster, with freeway on-ramps for arms and a heart as black as coal...
Bender: Well, if that new guy can't handle things, gimme a call.
