The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSFavorite Rajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
Sheldon: Teams are traditionally named after fierce creatures, thus intimidating one's opponent.
Raj: Then we could be the Bengal Tigers.
Sheldon: Poor choice—gram for gram, no animal exceeds the relative fighting strength of the army ant.
Raj: Maybe so, but you can't incinerate a Bengal tiger with a magnifying glass
Raj: Whatever, dude. She kissed me.
Howard: It might've been on your lips but it was my kiss.
Raj: Oh, fine, let's agree she kissed both of us.
Howard: Okay.
Leonard just realized that Penny's been hiding him from her friends because he's a tiny little man who flies kites
Raj: Did you know, in the Mumbai-McDonald's you can't get a Big Mac? All you can get is a Chicken Maharajah Mac. And the special sauce: Curry. Which, in India, believe you me, is really not that special
Howard wanted to write "mumbo jumbo," but I said no, our Sheldon would say "hokum."
Raj [referring to Dennis Kim]: Do you know what he did? He watched me work for ten minutes and then started to design a simple piece of software that could replace me.
Leonard: Is that even possible?
Raj: As it turns out, yes
Raj: Whoa! What's your hurry, cowboy? Savor the moment.
[Raj and Howard slowly remove the plastic off Raj's new iPhone 4s]
Howard: Oh, yeah.
Raj: We need a social catalyst.
Leonard: Like what? We can't get 15-year-old girls drunk.
Wolowitz: Or can we...!?
Raj: What happened?
Sheldon: Obviously another carnal fiasco with the 'Shiksee' goddess.
Howard: Shiksa. Shik-Sa.
Sheldon: Forgive me. Yiddish was not spoken in East Texas. And if it was, it wasn't spoken for long.
Raj: I'd like for you to call me sexy.
Siri: [chimes]From now on, I'll call you sexy. Okay?
Raj: Okay!
Raj: They put you under for a cleaning?
Sheldon: They have to -- I'm a biter.
Leonard: It should go back to Peter Jackson. He made the movies; it belongs to him.
Wolowitz: Fine, he can have it back -- as long as he promises to make me a hobbit in his next movie.
Raj: There are no Jewish hobbits.
Wolowitz: Clearly, you've never been to my house for dinner on Rosh Hashana.
