Darlene: The realtor says that I have to be part of a couple to have a real shot with the seller. Apparently, any big, dumb sack of male DNA will make me more attractive as a buyer.
Ben: If you’re asking me to pretend that we’re a couple, then I need to be wooed. Tell me I’m pretty.
Darlene: Okay, you’re a big, dumb sack of pretty. Now, will you go?
Ben: Now that I feel good about myself, yes.

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The Conners Season 4 Episode 13: "Sex, Lies, and House Hunting"
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The Conners Season 4 Episode 13 Quotes

Darlene: That’s from the trash. You’re eating trash candy.
Dan: Waste not, want not. That’s in the Bible. I’m doing God’s work.

Darlene: There is a really good house here. It’s right at the top of my price range, but it’s the only one that hasn’t said, train lovers look no further.
Dan: I wouldn’t consider the train a deal-breaker. I think it’s nice when your house rocks you to sleep.