Curb Your Enthusiasm Quotes
Dr. Schaffer: Your life is mostly going to be taking her to appointments or here with her in the house.
Larry: I can still play golf.
Dr. Schaffer: Absolutely not. I don't imagine you'd have time for that.
Larry: Once a week?
Dr. Schaffer: No times a week. You won't have time for that.
Larry: What? Nine holes?
Dr. Schaffer: Zero holes, Mr. David!
You can't make an empty gesture to a Funkhouser.
Larry
Cady: People are gonna love you.
Larry: Why are they gonna love me? People dislike me intensely.
What the fuck were you thinking!? A picture of Bush, who gives a flying fuck! I'd fuck her with a Bush mask on!
Jeff
Colby: Did you ever see our show?
Solly: Did you see our show? It was called The Holocaust!!!"
Rabbi: Right, so then uh, I'll, uh... do the blessing, uh, the last blessing, just a little bit of Hebrew, and then I will put the glass on the floor, and we'll step on it, and that'll be it.
Cheryl's Dad: That's when everybody yells "a matzoh toff"?
Rabbi: No no, it's "mazel tov". It means good luck.
Cheryl's Dad: Could we say "yippee!" or something?
Cheryl's Mom: Or "good luck" or something?
Cheryl's Dad: "Hallelujah" would be good.
Solly: I'm a survivor.
Colby: I'm a survivor!
Solly: I'm a survivor!
Colby: I'M A SURVIVOR!
You come here to fuck or you come here to talk about your dirty suit? Hmm? Fuck or suit?
Anna
Anna: It's the sabbath; I cannot drive.
Larry: We can walk. I'll take you piggy-back.
Anna: (sexy) Oh, now you're talking!
Susie: Wandering Elk, whatever the fuck your name is, you were paid already.
Wandering Bear: You don't need to talk like that. You're a better person than that.
Larry: No, she's not.
Larry: I waved to a guy in a Prius and he didn't wave back.
Jeff: I don't wave to people in the same car as me.
Larry: We're Prius drivers; we're a special breed.
(to Cheryl) How's your vagina?
Wandering Bear
