Peter: I am going to the Clam and I am getting my booth back! And Meg, you're gay.
Meg: No, I'm not.
Peter: You like guys, right?
Meg: Yeah.
Peter: That's called being gay.

Stewie: How long have you been there?
Chris: Long enough to know that you have herpes and do weird stuff with your teddy bear.
Stewie: HE does weird stuff; I just don't stop him.

You've got herpes, too? This house is like backstage at a Whitesnake concert.

Stewie

Scumbag: Smells like this guy's already wet himself.
Peter: Don't flatter yourself--that was from this morning.

We're supposed to stick together! Like goatee guys at a barbecue!

Peter

Oh my god! Your mouth looks like the underside of a boat!

Teacher

Oh my god, look at you! You're more herpes than dog!

Stewie

Stewie: Are you blood brothers with Meg because you ate her tampon out of the trash?
Brian: No, that, that's something else.

Says 'Glenn Quagmire.' But if you squint and imagine it says 'Peter Griffin,' it says 'Peter Griffin'!

Peter

Family Guy Season 12 Episode 16 Quotes

Stewie: Are you blood brothers with Meg because you ate her tampon out of the trash?
Brian: No, that, that's something else.

Says 'Glenn Quagmire.' But if you squint and imagine it says 'Peter Griffin,' it says 'Peter Griffin'!

Peter