Chris (Luke): Well, I guess I'll go bulls-eye some womp rats in my T-16.
Quagmire (C-3PO): My god, you shoot small animals for fun? That's the first indicator of a serial killer, ya freak.
Chris (Luke): There's two suns and no women, what the hell am I supposed to do?

Quagmire (C-3PO): Hey, mind if I turn on the radio?
Announcer: WTAT Tatooine's all-talk radio.
Rush Limbaugh: My good friends, the liberal galactic media is at it again, they never stop. Now they're trying to convince us that Hoth is melting. Well that's crazy, just trying to scare us. Well if that wasn't enough to get you mad, we now have news that Lando Calrissian has been made the chief administrator of the Bespin mining facility. Gee, I wonder how he got that job. Well let me tell you how he got that job, affirmative action strikes again. The time is 8:50.

Chris (Luke): They're coming too fast!
Peter (Han): (Under his breath) Ah boy, nickel for every time that's happened. (yelling) Just keep shootin' Luke.

Chris (Luke): (after shooting a TIE fighter) I got him! I got him!
Peter (Han): Great kid, don't get penisy.

Chris (Luke): Hey Han!
Peter (Han): What!
Chris (Luke): Why do they call them TIE-Fighters?
Peter (Han): No idea!
(Inside TIE-Fighter cockpit)
TIE Fighter Pilot: (Shouts in Thai)

Ellen Griswold: Clark, I don't like the look of this neighborhood
Clark Griswold: Come on, Ellen, it's important for the kids to witness the plight of the Rebellion. Kids, you noticing all this plight?
[An X-Wing flying next to them is shot down]
Clark Griswold: (Starts rolling up his window) Roll 'em up!

Chris: Didn't Robot Chicken already do this three months ago?
Peter: I wouldn't worry about it, Chris. I don't even think people are aware of that show's existence.
Chris: Well, I don't know, Dad. I think a decent number of people watch it.
Peter: Oh, really? Define 'decent'.
Chris: I think it's the highest rated show on Cartoon Network, and the Star Wars episode doubled that audience.
Peter: Well, yeah. But double ten people is like twenty people. So, uh, what kind of numbers are we talking about here, you know?
Chris: Don't be glib about this stuff, Dad. It's a legitimate show and they beat you to the punch.
Peter: Uh, I don't know about that, Chris. To me, a legitimate show is on ABC, CBS, NBC... you know, one of the real networks.
Chris: Hahaha. I don't know about that, Dad.
Peter: And besides, what's up with that fifteen minute runtime? What is that? It's like fifteen minutes of guys playing with Star Wars dolls. Oh yay!
Chris: Oh, so you do know the show!
Peter: I read part of a review online. I am not a fan.
Chris: You know, Dad. You're a real jerk!

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Lois (Leia): Governor Tarkin. I smelled your stench as soon as we were brought on board.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Um, actually, that's me. I made a Darth Doodie.
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): Princess Leia, we've decided to test our Death Star planet blower-upper gun on your home planet of Alderaan.
Lois (Leia): NO!
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): She said no. Should we still do it?
Stewie (Darth Vader): Yes.

I have you now, young Skywalker. And with today's gas prices, not a moment too soon!

Stewie (Darth Vader)

Chris (Luke): You don't believe in the force, do you?
Peter (Han): Oh, you mean that thing you just learned about three hours ago, and am now judging me for not believing in?

Quagmire (C3PO): Who would you rather do: Jabba the Hutt right after a shower, or a service droid?
Cleveland (R2-D2): My father was a service droid!

Family Guy Season 6 Quotes

You can kiss the lower part of the back of the canister that is my body!

Cleveland (R2-D2)

Death Star Officer 1: Any attack made by the Rebels against this station would be a useless gesture, no matter what technical data they've obtained. This station is now the ultimate power in the universe.
Stewie (Darth Vader): That is fantastic! Terrific work! So no weaknesses at all, huh?
Death Star Officer 1: N- (considers) no.
Stewie (Darth Vader): You, uh, you hesitated there. Is there something I should know?
Death Star Officer 1: No, it's virtually indestructable, like 99.99 percent.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Uh...OK, wouldn't be doin' my job if I didn't ask what's the .01?
Death Star Officer 1: Well, I- I mean, there's this little hole, it was kind of an aesthetic choice by the architect, and if you shoot a laser into this hole, uh, the station blows up.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that sounds like a pretty big design flaw there.
Death Star Officer 1: No, no, no the hole's only two meters across.
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): Well, that's no bigger than a womp rat.
Death Star Officer 1: Exactly. And even to get within range of it, you have to skim along this whole trench, it's not a big deal.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Well, I mean, I mean, can't we board it up or, you know, put some plywood over it or something?
Death Star Officer 1: Well, that would look terrible! I mean, we got to think about re-sale.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Re-sale? Wh-what are you talking about? This property is right above Sunset, the value's only gonna go up.
Death Star Officer 1: Lord Vader, your inside references to the Los Angeles real estate market haven't given you the clairvoyance to turn a profit on that condo in Glendale, nor has it-
(Vader begins choking him with the Force)
Stewie (Darth Vader): I find your lack of faith disturbing. That property is in a prime location, twenty minutes to the beach, twenty minutes to downtown!
Death Star Officer 1: (choking) There's nothing to do downtown!
Mayor Adam West (Grand Moff Tarkin): Enough of this! Vader, release him.
Stewie (Darth Vader): As you wish. (releases the officer, who collapses on the table, gasping for air) All right, so we gonna plug up that hole?
Death Star Officer 2: Yeah, we can get it done tomorrow if price is no object.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Eyuuuuh...
Death Star Officer 2: We'll get estimates.
Stewie (Darth Vader): Yeah, get estimates, yeah ha, yeah, yeah ha ha, yeah.