Sometimes you say shit that sounds made up.

Adam

You might just need to face up to the fact that you're just not meant for a job in the traditional sense.

Adam

Be nice to your parents, okay?

Marnie

You are from New York, therefore you are just naturally interesting.

Hannah

I cut her off so she'd have something to write about!

Hannah's mom

Why is everyone struggling in New York? Why don't we all just move here and start the revolution?

Hannah

You don't wanna know me.

Adam [to Hannah]

I could massage your groin in a non-sexual way.

Shoshanna

I've never seen him outside his house. I've never seen him with a shirt on!

Hannah [about Adam]

All I ever wanted for you was to find satisfaction outside of our relationship.

Marnie [to Charlie]

Adam: Could you fly?
Hannah: No I couldn't fly, but I didn't have ears that big.

When I broke up with my girlfriend from college, so sad, I lost 30 lbs, I couldn't move or talk or get my dick hard, but it also made me go hey who am I and what do I want?

Adam

Girls Quotes

Ok I think I got everything, testicles, spectacles, wallet, and watch.

Hannah

Jessa: It's pot, do you want some?
Shoshanna: Oh no, I'm hyper enough already.