I need this job. I’m saving up to buy a noose to hang myself.

Santana

• Permalink: I need this job. I’m saving up to buy a noose to hang myself.
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Now everywhere I go I’m known as the girl with the raging yeast infection.

Santana

• Permalink: Santana: Now everywhere I go I’m known as the girl with the raging yeast infection.
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Do you know how insane you sound?

Kurt

• Permalink: Do you know how insane you sound?
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(to April) You did the worst thing you possibly could have done. You gave me hope.

Will

• Permalink: You did the worst thing you possibly could have done. You gave me hope.
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I’m torn. One is black and one is Jewish.

Jake

• Permalink: I’m torn. One is black and one is Jewish.
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We’re enjoying a long engagement.

Kurt

• Permalink: We’re enjoying a long engagement.
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Thank you April for that wonderful lesson in female empowerment.

Will

• Permalink: Thank you April for that wonderful lesson in female empowerment.
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The past is dead to me. Except for maybe just one thing.

Puck

• Permalink: The past is dead to me. Except for maybe just one thing.
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The only thing I can see you giving birth to is a bushel of russet potatoes.

Sue

• Permalink: The only thing I can see you giving birth to is a bushel of russet potatoes.
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You two in the same room and there are no stitches? That’s an improvement.

Kurt

• Permalink: You two in the same room and there are no stitches? That’s an improvement.
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Have you noticed how hot I look in my uniform?

Puck

• Permalink: Have you noticed how hot I look in my uniform?
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Some people just don’t know how to screw things.

Sam

• Permalink: Some people just don’t know how to screw things.
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