Lucifer
Fridays on NetflixLucifer Season 3 Quotes
Ladies, ladies! Let's be fruitful and multiply! Allow me to bless you with my seed.
Abel
Lucifer: So what you're saying is hell made him multi-lingual and completely adaptable?
Cain: And we put him in the body of a young woman.
Maze: Did you know that Abel was the first soul in hell?
Lucifer: Mmm. An infernal guinea pig, so to speak.
Maze: We all learned to torture by torturing him.
Do you know how many times I've tried to tell people, "Abel is the asshat."? Nobody ever believes me.
Cain
Linda: As much as I tried to tell myself otherwise, I knew that what we were doing was going to hurt her, and I did it anyway. That's how much I wanted to be with you Amendadiel. Look, you've made me happier than I've been in a long, long time, but I was being selfish. Maze is my friend. I can't be with you anymore, not when it does this to her.
Amenadiel: You know, it's not fair for her to take this away from us.
Linda: Selfish? Selfish?! All I do is listen to your problems, everyone's problems, so yeah, for once I put myself first and did what makes me happy so sue me or torture me or better yet, why don't you just skewer me with one of your knives! But before you do, know that this wasn't some fling, that what Amenadiel and I found was completely unexpected but 100% real.
Maze: But you were my friend.
Maze: Linda. This is Todd, your date. [pushes a guy toward Linda]
Todd: This is blue lobelia. Native Americans use them to treat constipation.
Linda: Uh...thank you?
Trixie: Mommy says that sometimes people are just scared to tell the truth. Maybe they need a little help.
Maze: That's not a bad idea, Trix. Helping people tell the truth is kinda my thing.
Amenadiel: I would do anything for you. What? Is that too sappy?
Linda: [shakes her head no]
Chloe: I know how fans can get obsessed with their idols.
Lucifer: Yes, and with their boobs. Like after you did Hot Tub High School, Detective.
Chloe: If you were her, where would you guys go?
Lucifer: Ooh, ahhh, strip club.
Dan: Comic-con.
Lucifer: Aah!
Dan: Forensics convention.
Lucifer: Strip club!
Dan: Dude, you already said that. Why would Ella take her brother to the strip club?
Lucifer: For the free buffet.
Lucifer: Tell me, Tiffany, what is it you desire.
Tiffany: To punch every millennial in the face.
Lucifer: Really? I mean, I don't disagree, but still.
