Ray Donovan
Sundays 9:00 PM on ShowtimeRay Donovan Quotes
Mrs. Minassian, my father's a dipshit, he's always been a dipshit. Unfortunately there's nothing I can do about that. What I can do is offer to pay you back for any inconvenience he may have caused you.
Why couldn't you just play fuckin' bingo like a normal old man?
Paige: Do you feel any differently?
Ray: What?
Paige: Now that you got everything you wanted?
Ray: No.
Paige: That's too bad.
Thank you, Ray. Boy. What a freak show that was. Has that chick ever heard of Invisalign?
Ed
Mickey: I ain't fuckin' senile.
Ray: Fine. You're not senile. Go tell Joe Friday out there you want to wear a wire and get your brains blown out in Long Beach.
Mickey: You could say I get confused from time to time.
Mickey: They ain't gonna believe I'm senile, Ray.
Ray: Really? I don't think it's such a big stretch.
Mickey: Fuck you.
If you haven't learned that Mickey always draws a shit hand, that's on you.
Lady Cop: You want to trade your brother for your dad?
Ray: Any day of the fuckin' week.
Bridget: Admit you're attracted to me
Mr. Donellen: I am. Attracted to you. [Bridget kisses him.]
Terry: We can't take communion.
Ray: It's a fuckin' cracker.
You are a worthwhile human being. You have a healthy appetite for sex. You are beautiful. You are a flawed man.
Ed
Ray: It's not your wedding present.
Bunch: [looks at the check] No? What'd you get me?
Ray: A standing mixer.
Bunch: What the fuck is that?
Ray: Kitchen shit. Abby picked it out.
Bunch: Thank you, Ray.
Ray: Congratulations.
