South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralFavorite South Park Quotes
Pip: Cheerio Stan, I do say, it's quite a nice surprise seeing you here.
Stan: Shut up Pip.
Stan: (watching the news) Wait a minute.
(Stan looks out the window and sees ATF tanks and attack helicopters)
Reporter: There are choppers here along with several tanks...
Stan: Dude, that's this house. They think our parents were the religious cults.
Reporter: We've just receieve photos from the recon team of the actions inside the house, (they show the picture of Stan looking out the window) showing there are indeed innocent children trap inside. Those sick cult fanatic bastards!
Stan: DUDE!
Reporter: Setting the house on fire seemed a little dangerous, Commander.
Agent in Charge: It is, but we can't let them kill themselves.
(Couple left Mackey's house)
Agent in charge: Hold it right there. Whatever it is you're attempting to do, do not do it.
Couple: . . .
Agent in Charge: Your freaky religious cult will not succeed in its plans.
Husband: What?
Agent in charge: Do not move or we'll...
(Couples shot dead)
Agent in charge: Goddamnit, who was that?
(some agents raised their hand)
Agent in charge: Did you see them move?
Agent 1: I did.
Agent 2: Yeah, yeah, they moved all right.
Guests: Goodbye everyone.
(they leave the house)
Agent in Charge: Look out!
(ATF agents shoot everyone dead)
Agent in Charge: Hold your fire! Okay, people at the door, that was a warning. Go back inside and tell everyone that they have one minute to surrender.
Are you a sourpuss?
</i> Dougie
Butters: Hey what are we gonna do huh? They shot at us, they really shot at us. They ain't gonna stop until were all dead I betcha, us and all our families. (Stan slaps Butters)
Stan: Get a hold of yourself man!
Butters: How can you slap my face Stan, huh? Why on earth would you go do that anyway?
Pip: Can I be Jaclyn Smith? Can I?
Butters: No, uh, I get to be Jaclyn Smith. See, I thought of Charlie's Angels and I get to be Jaclyn Smith c-cause I thought of it.
(Cartman and Craig are Sumoing)
Cartman: Respect mah authoritah!! (Shoves his ass at Craig)
Craig: Oh, Jesus! I can't take it!
Sumo Trainer: Fight back! Resist the ass!
Craig: How can I resist an ass so great!?!
Sumo Master: It is only an ass! You must overcome the ass with your mind!
I like math.
Dougie
How come they're actin' that way, Stan? Huh? How come they're laughin' and falling down and such?
Butters
Pip: Which ladies' garments would you like, Stan?
Stan: Dude. I'm not wearing ladies clothes and I'm not playing Charlie's Angels. You guys are Melvins and I'm not one of you. So you go ahead and be Melvins and leave me alone!
Pip: Well. Alrighty, then.
