Marge: I'm disappointed in you. But it turns out I had a wonderful time with Ruth Powers. In fact, we're going out again tomorrow night.
Homer: Marge, that's twice, I think you're spending entirely too much time with this woman!

• Permalink: I'm disappointed in you. But it turns out I had a wonderful time...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Hello? Can I get some help? Snack-related mishap!

Homer

• Permalink: Hello? Can I get some help? Snack-related mishap!
• Added: August 06, 2010

Oh, I'm uh.. on a road, uh.. looks to be asphelt. Um, ah geez, trees, shrubs um.... I'm directly under the earths sun... nnnow!

Wiggum

• Permalink: Oh, I'm uh.. on a road, uh.. looks to be asphelt. Um, ah geez, t...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Ruth: I envy you and Homer.
Marge: Thank you. Why?
Ruth: If you ever met my ex-husband, you'd understand. All he ever did was eat, sleep and drink beer.
Marge: Your point being?

• Permalink: I envy you and Homer. Thank you. Why? If you ever met my ex-...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Carl: Hey, Homer, you wanna get a beer on the way home?
Homer: (bitter) I can't. I gotta take my wife to the ballet.
Lenny: Heh, You're gonna go see the bear in the little car, huh?

• Permalink: Hey, Homer, you wanna get a beer on the way home? I can't. I ...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Oh, solid waste! I could kiss you (starts kissing it) Eww-- (kisses some more)--Mmm, I think that was pizza!

Homer

• Permalink: Oh, solid waste! I could kiss you Eww-- --Mmm, I think that was...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Bart: You're absolutely right, Dad. We don't need a baby-sitter.
Homer: Wait a minute (Takes out card reading: "Always do opposite of what Bart Says.") You kids do need a baby-sitter!
Bart: (to himself) Blast that infernal card! (to Homer) Hey, Dad. Don't give me that card.
Homer: Here ya go--(Pulls card away)--No!

• Permalink: You're absolutely right, Dad. We don't need a baby-sitter. Alw...
• Added: August 06, 2010

I should get home to my daughter before that naked talk show comes on.

Ruth Powers

• Permalink: I should get home to my daughter before that naked talk show com...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Look Marge, I'm sorry I haven't been a better husband. I'm sorry about the time I tried to make gravy in the bathtub. I'm sorry I used your wedding dress to wax the car. And I'm sorry--Oh well, let's just say I'm sorry for the whole marriage up to this point.

Homer

• Permalink: Look Marge, I'm sorry I haven't been a better husband. I'm sorry...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Lisa: I always knew someday Mom would violently rise up and cast off the shackles of our male oppressors.
Bart: Eh, shut your yap.

• Permalink: I always knew someday Mom would violently rise up and cast off t...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Chief Wiggum: Mmm, engine-black eggs. If we can keep these down, we'll be sitting pretty.
(Marge and Ruth drive by)
Homer: That's them!
Chief Wiggum: Quiet! I can't hear the eggs.

• Permalink: Mmm, engine-black eggs. If we can keep these down, we'll be sitt...
• Added: August 06, 2010

Ah, just get one of those inflatable women. But make sure it's a woman, though, because one time I...uh, heh...

Chief Wiggum

• Permalink: Ah, just get one of those inflatable women. But make sure it's a...
• Added: August 06, 2010