Welcome to TV Fanatic's Gossip Girl Round Table, where our panel gathers to review the events of "The Empire Strikes Jack" and discuss the developments to come.
Once again, with DANdy on his honeymoon with the new Mrs. DANdy, Gossip Guy and Mister Meester attempt to hold the fort by dissecting Monday's Gossip Girl.
On tap: Last night's top quotes and stories, plot holes and schemes ...
1. What was your favorite Gossip Girl quote last night?
Gossip Guy: Chuck: "I've come this far without my mother, I'm not gonna back down now." Blair: "Well if it's a war Chuck wants, it's a war he'll get." Only because this makes me think Chair is going to team up to take down Jack.
Mister Meester: A tie between "Miss Blair, you have no friends. Even NYU minions very second-rate!" and Brandeis: "Can I help you?" Dorota: "I am Dorota." LOL at both.
2. What was your favorite story line from last night?
Gossip Guy: Vanessa's. Hahahahaha! Man, I'm so funny. Sorry, where was I?
Oh yeah, favorite story line. I'm going to pick the fashion one over Chuck's, which ended up being too convoluted and not making sense. The fashion one had some hilarious moments by Blair and Dorota as they hired an army of prostitutes. Plus, Blair's blackmailing of Mr. Conwell was reminiscent of the Blair Waldorf we loved from prior seasons.
Mister Meester: Chuck's story line continues to show what an outstanding actor Ed Westwick is, and I really want to see Chair topple Jack once and for all. But the Elizabeth character is more confusing to me than anything, so I was slightly more into the Jenny/Blair stories. Both were terrific, taking us back to their characters' roots in a way. B is hilarious.
3. Worst schemer: Agnes or Serena/Nate combined?
Gossip Guy: Serena and Nate by far. These two have the combined IQ of the dessert items they use during their ridiculously hot sex. Let's just stick to that instead.
Mister Meester: They're really bad, but Serenate is cute when they try to act all smart. Agnes is equally terrible, but just evil with no redeeming charm, so she wins.
Hot? Yes. Good at scheming? No.
4. Plot hole of the night: Eleanor not going through with the deal, Jenny needing someone to watch her stuff at the Waldorfs', or Chuck's mom leaving at the end?
Gossip Guy: I truly do believe that Eleanor would be that stuck up as to not adjust her line for Mr. Conwell and I never put anything past Jenny. Now, Chuck's entire plot line felt like a gaping hole to me. Not sure where to begin, but yes, we can go with every scene of Chuck's mother, including her leaving at the end, as a gaping chasm. Good riddance to bad acting slash bad character.
Mister Meester: A tie between #1 and #3, since both made statements to the contrary. Eleanor HAD to have this deal, supposedly, and Chuck's mother leaving Jack and Chuck at the end? Baffling. As far as J, I'll buy that one. Trouble just seems to find this girl.
5. How far will Chuck go to get his hotel back?
Gossip Guy: With a witty episode titled like "The Empire Strikes Jack," I was hoping this would be an episode of the entire UES crew teaming up to take down Jack. Instead, I'm really hoping Chuck will finally suck it up and take a little help from the ultimate schemer, Blair, next week. I can only imagine the plan that the powers of Chair finally combined could involve. All I know is that after messing with these two, if Jack only loses the hotel, he'll consider himself lucky.
Mister Meester: I don't know, but is anyone else extremely concerned after seeing next week's promo (which we'll post in a little while)? Very Indecent Proposal-esque.
What do you think? Sound off in the comments!