Charlie sits around drinking whiskey with the guys as they reminisce about their sexual exploits with women, even if two of those guys (Herb and Alan) share the same woman for most of their stories.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie meets his new neighbor, former NFL player, Jerome "Mad Dog." Jerome has a cute daughter, Celeste, that Jake seems very into and her very into him.. for reasons unknown.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie finds out that Jake's old teachr, Ms. Pasternak has become a stripper after her fling with him.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jake is dating a nine year old at school in order to get her help on his math homework. Here he is on the phone with her with Charlie in the background.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie plays the piano while Alan sings some classic holiday songs and looks like embarrassing Evelyn in the process.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie and Chelsea watch a game of basketball and discuss Chelsea going to her ex-mother-in-law's funeral and spending the night with her ex-husband. Enter the jealousy!
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
No, we don't care if Jake and Eldridge choose Dumbass for the name of their YouTube show. They'll always be the Assketeeers to us.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie Sheen poses here for a CBS promotional photo. The troubled actor has starred on Two and a Half Men for years.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Charlie Harper is played by Charlie Sheen. No matter what personal problems this guy has, the public keeps tuning in to his sitcom.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Alan goes to sleep wearing matching pajamas with his ventriloquist doll. Yeah, Alan's not lonely or anything.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Out with the old, in the with the new, as Charlie introduces his new fiancee, Chelsea, to his old, Mia.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
A photo of the complete Two and a Half Men season one cast. Oh Rose, how we miss you and your craziness now.
Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: For every gorgeous woman out there's a guy tired of banging her.
Alan: But that guy is never me.

Women reject me for 100 different reasons. White teeth would reduce that to 99 problems.

Alan