Buddy, you would not believe the day I'm having. Quiet, jackas...

Jake: Buddy, you would not believe the day I'm having.
Janitor: Quiet, jackass. What'd you say to Elliot to make her run off like that? 'Cause if you hurt her...
Jake: I didn't say anything! Everyone around here is crazy.
Janitor: That's not true. Let me put down my bag of rats and explain something to you...
Jake: Bag of rats? Those alive?
Janitor: Most of 'em are. I put a dead one in the middle, that way all the live ones get a good look at him, they start toeing that line. Know what I'm saying?
Jake: I very much don't.


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Character:
The Janitor
Episode:
Scrubs Season 4 Episode 23: "My Faith in Humanity"
Show:
Scrubs
Related Quotes:
The Janitor Quotes, Scrubs Season 4 Episode 23 Quotes, Scrubs Quotes
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Scrubs Season 4 Episode 23 Quotes

That's a cute couple. I give 'em a week.

Dr. Cox

Lady: I can't believe that six young men stopped to help an old lady change a tire!
J.D.: And don't you forget who put that tire on and tightened those lugnuts, Martha! Okay, sweetie, have fun at the swap-meet! Drive safe.
J.D.'s Narration: Yep. It sure feels good to do the right thing.
J.D.: Righty loosey, lefty tighty.
J.D.'s Narration: Oh, "righty tighty! lefty loosey!" Ohhhh, man. It still feels good.

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  2. Buddy, you would not believe the day I'm having. Quiet, jackas...