The Big Bang Theory

Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBS
The big bang theory
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Dr. Jeffries: Hold on. You ... you have a girlfriend?
Amy: Hey look -- we're wearing the same orthopedic shoes. I can't believe I dress like a celebrity.
Dr. Jeffries: O-Okay, I get it now.

Amy: So you just got lucky?
Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper doesn't get lucky.
Amy: You and me both.

Amy: Sheldon, you're not a weirdo.
Sheldon: I wasn't speaking about me.

Sheldon: You sure your mothlike personality won't be drawn to this blazing fire that is myself?
Amy: More and more sure.

I'm hoping to put his love of repetition to good use someday.

Amy: ... if he weren't in the movie, the Nazis would have still found the ark, taken it to the island, opened it up and all died ... just like they did.
Sheldon: [jaw dropped]
Amy: Let me close that for you.

Indiana Jones plays no role in the outcome of the story.

Amy: When you told me I was going to be "losing my virginity," I didn't think you meant you'd be showing me Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time.
Sheldon: My apologies. I chose my words poorly. I should have said you were about to have your world rocked on my couch.

Sheldon: To the planetarium!
Penny: Let's go!
Leonard: To the Tar Pits!
Bernadette: Let's go!
Amy: There's a Neil Diamond concert next month.
Howard: Let's go!

Sheldon: Careful, Amy. The friend of my enemy's girlfriend is my enemy.
Amy: Really?
Sheldon: Yes. You're either with me or against me.
Amy: Do you want to take the bus to work?
Sheldon: Maybe there's a third option.

Penny: He's still mad at Leonard, huh?
Amy: Well, he's mad at you, too. He said you were the succubus that led his friend astray.
Penny: I don't know what succubus is, but it has "suck" in it, so that can't be good.

Sheldon: Now I think I hear kissing.
Amy: Like you know what kissing sounds like.
Sheldon: There's kissing in Star Trek, smarty-pants.

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 173 in total

TBBT Quotes

Penny: Here's a question-- as an alien pretending to be human, are you planning to engage in any post-prom mating rituals with Amy?
Sheldon: There are post-prom mating rituals?
Penny: Not always. Unless your date drives a van with an air mattress, then always.
Sheldon: Well, if it's part of the prom experience, then I'm open to it.
Penny: You're kidding.
Sheldon: I may be an alien, but I have urges.If Amy wants to copulate by firing her eggs into space, well, then, I will happily catch them with the reproductive sac on my upper flermin. I'm not the best at reading facial cues, but I can see that you're a little turned on.

Penny: I always tear up when the Grinch's heart grows three sizes.
Sheldon: Tears seem appropriate. Enlargement of the heart muscle, or hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, is a serious disease which can lead to congestive heart failure.