Tony: [after woman fires rifle at the door]: Who do you think you are, Sarah Palin?

• Permalink: Who do you think you are, Sarah Palin?
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Salim: DiNozzo. It's an Italian name.
Tony: An educated man.
Salim: I got my B.S. from Yale University.
Tony: [scoffs] I got my B.S. in the streets ... You guys got a lousy football team.

• Permalink: DiNozzo. It's an Italian name. An educated man. I got my B.S...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Tony: It's all about chemistry. The zing, the pahh!
McGee: What do you mean, 'pahh'?
Tony: You know ... pahh.

• Permalink: It's all about chemistry. The zing, the pahh! What do you mean...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Tony: Why do you do what you do?
Khan: If I asked you the same thing, I suspect our answers would be the same.
Tony: Duty?
Khan: No. There are two reasons that are far more base. The steady pay check. Power. The feeling that you've--
Tony: Made a difference.
Khan: Conquered something. Like Caesar.

• Permalink: Why do you do what you do? If I asked you the same thing, I su...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ziva: He really likes her, Tony. You have to tell him.
Tony (laughs): I know. But it's actually kind of flattering... in a creepy way.
Ziva (angry): What did you think would happen?
Tony: I don't know... the flaw in the plan was the plan but I got another plan to end it.
Ziva: Which is?
Tony: You ever see "Fatal Attraction"?

• Permalink: He really likes her, Tony. You have to tell him. I know. But i...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

McGee: I can take care of the video surveillance, it's the K-9 patrol I'm worried about.
Tony: Chillax, bro. All these budget cuts and economic problems, they can't afford dogs. Trust me.

• Permalink: I can take care of the video surveillance, it's the K-9 patrol I...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ziva: Dead man is ICE.
Tony: That's cold.

• Permalink: Dead man is ICE. That's cold.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Is she single? No. That's a bad idea. I mean, she reminds me of someone annoying. I just can't figure out who it is.

• Permalink: Is she single? No. That's a bad idea. I mean, she reminds me of someone annoying. I just...
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Tony: Taking the tour?
Ziva: I have my first psych evaluation.
Tony: Oh, yeah. I always loved those.
Ziva: I'm sure. You get to talk about yourself the entire time.

• Permalink: Taking the tour? I have my first psych evaluation. Oh, yeah....
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Gibbs: Hey! You got something to say?
Bishop: Not in a million years.
Tony: Actually, I just want you to know I understand completely. I do. There's nothing more enticing than forbidden fruit. Especially the kind you can spoon with.

• Permalink: Tony makes a bad joke.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Ziva: So this is where a redthroat would hang out after being overseas for months.
Tony: It's not redthroat, it's redneck.
Ziva: Oh.

• Permalink: So many red throats. You mean rednecks.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Tony: Maybe you and I can find a court, play a little one-on-one?
Ziva: You can ask Adam out on a date later.

• Permalink: Maybe you and I can find a court, play a little one-on-one? Yo...
• Rating: 3.7 / 5.0