Tuesdays 8:00 PM on FOX
Glee

Artie: Am I about to lose my virginity?
Brittany: Before our deut, we're gonna do it.

Brittany was the only person we could find on short notice. We bribed her with Dots.

Sam: Everything Bieber does is epic.
Artie: Truth.

Will: Rachel have you ever seen a tackle football game? When they tackle, it hurts.
Artie: And not in a good, Mellencamp kind of way.

Artie: I told my parents I only want one thing for Christmas this year: stop friending me on Facebook.

Is the problem your outfit? You look like a cheerleader zombie corpse.

Will: When I'm sick there's only one thing that makes me feel good.
Artie: Gin and juice...

Artie: I thought I was over someone, but I still think I have feelings for them.
Brittany: The Clintons?

Artie: You've never made eye contact with me.
Brittany: For awhile, I thought you were a robot.

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