Favorite Bender Quotes
Zoidberg: So what is it, already?
Farnsworth: It's a single atom of jumbonium, an element so rare the nucleus alone is worth more than $50,000.
Bender: How much more?
Farnsworth: 100,000. That's why I hid it here, under my mattress.
Bender: I think I got whiplash.
Leela: You can't have whiplash, you don't have a neck.
Bender: I meant ass whiplash.
Bender: Stop tempting me! For once in my life, I have found inner peace!
Fry: (scoffs) That's for losers. C'mon, sin your heart out!
Leela: Look at that five o'clock rust. You've been up all night not drinking, haven't you?
Bender: Hey. What I don't do is none of your business.
Leela: Please, Bender. Have some malt liquor. If not for yourself then for the people who love you.
Bender: I hate the people who love me and they hate me.
Referee: Presenting Bender the Offender!
Bender: I'm just an ex-con trying to go straight and get my kids back.
Fry: Great! He's whacked out on electricity again.
Bender: No, I'm whacked out on life. My friends, I found religion.
Fry: Religion? Is this another scam to get free yarmulkes?
Fry: Wow. Four identical castles.
Bender: Each one more identical than the last.
I thought they were selfish, but in the end, it turns out it was I who thought they were selfish.
Bender: I've been perusing your fortified wine list and I've selected the '71 Hobo's Delight, the '57 Chateau Part and the '66 Thunder Chevitz.
Waiter: Exquisite choices, sir.
Bender: And mix them all together in a big jug.
Fry: Who was that guy?
Bender: Your momma. Now shut up and drag me to work...
Do I preach to you while you're lying stoned in a gutter?
Farnsworth: Bender, you won't believe this, but the empathy chip burned out. The emotion you felt for Nibbler was actually your own.
Fry: Looks like Bender learned an important lesson about respecting other people's feelings after all.
Farnsworth: No, I'm wrong. The empathy chip was running at triple capacity.
Bender: And I still barely felt anything. Good night, losers!
