Glee
Fridays 8:00 PM on FOXFavorite Brittany Quotes
Brittany: I can't.
Sam: Is it my lips?
Brittany: No. Your lips are so soft and horizontal. I just like you too much to put you in danger.
Sam: Santana broke up with you.
Brittany: No, it's not just Santana. It's like, all the lesbians of the nation, and I don't know how they found out about Santana and I dating, but once they did, they started sending me, like, tweets and Facebook messages on Lord Tubbington's wall. I think it means a lot to them to see two super hot, popular girls in love, and I worry if they find out about you and I dating that they'll turn on you and get really violent and hurt your beautiful face and mouth.
[to Santana] I'm not breaking up with Sam. I really like him. He makes me feel really smart and think about things, like where air comes from, and how come in every movie about Jesus he dies at the end.
[to Rachel] Remember what I said when we first met. You're here because you're the best of the best.
Brody
Sam, despite your outlandishly low test scores, you're a genius.
I'm really surprised that Jesus Christ Superstar has chosen to end the world this way instead of the way he killed off the dinosaurs which was a global yeast infection.
Artie: Am I about to lose my virginity?
Brittany: Before our deut, we're gonna do it.
The key is to use your curling iron in the bathtub to keep you from being burnt.
Santana: Breakfast makes you confused.
Brittany: Sometimes it's sweet, sometime it's salty. What if I have eggs for dinner? What is that?
Best prom ever!
Santana: You're acting like a completely different person and it's making me sad.
Brittany: Well get over it because sadness is stupid.
Sue: And as you ponder your decision, I ask that you remember that that cannon has 2 little baby twin cannons, and one more on the way, and if you refuse to sign this, well, those little baby cannons might just go hungry.
Brittany: Baby cannons...
Sue: And the mama cannon has fibromyalgia so she can't work.
It looks like a Jewish cloud. *petting Jacob Ben-Israel's hair*
