I hope you all respect when I, Brittany S. Pierce, can escape the torment of Britney Spears.

Will: Who can tell me who Christopher Cross is?
Brittany: He discovered America.

People thought I went on vacation but I really spent the summer lost in the sewers.

Coach Beiste didn't touch my boobs. Actually, I wanna touch her boobs.

You look terrible. I look awesome.

Kurt: She changes her look faster than Britt changes sexual partners.
Brittany: It's true.

Mr. Hummel: If things get serious, use protection.
Brittany: Does he mean like a burglar alarm?

Kissing my armpits is a really big turn-on for me.

You're pretty much the only guy in this school I haven't made out with because I thought you were capital G gay. But now that I know you're not, having a perfect record would mean a lot to me. Let me know if you wanna tap this.

Who is that guy?

Brittany [on mohawk-shaven Puck]

I don't know how to turn on a computer.

Artie: I'm kind of getting cold feet.
Brittany: Can you even feel your feet?

Glee Quotes

It's not the broken dreams that break us. It's the ones we don't dare to dream.


What kid is gonna choose glee club over football? It would be ridiculous.