I hope you all respect when I, Brittany S. Pierce, can escape the torment of Britney Spears.

Will: Who can tell me who Christopher Cross is?
Brittany: He discovered America.

People thought I went on vacation but I really spent the summer lost in the sewers.

Coach Beiste didn't touch my boobs. Actually, I wanna touch her boobs.

You look terrible. I look awesome.

Kurt: She changes her look faster than Britt changes sexual partners.
Brittany: It's true.

Mr. Hummel: If things get serious, use protection.
Brittany: Does he mean like a burglar alarm?

Kissing my armpits is a really big turn-on for me.

You're pretty much the only guy in this school I haven't made out with because I thought you were capital G gay. But now that I know you're not, having a perfect record would mean a lot to me. Let me know if you wanna tap this.

Who is that guy?

Brittany [on mohawk-shaven Puck]

I don't know how to turn on a computer.

Artie: I'm kind of getting cold feet.
Brittany: Can you even feel your feet?

Glee Quotes

You know, a great big fat person once stood on this stage and told a group of a dozen or so nerds in hideous disco outfits that glee, by its very definition, is about opening yourself up to joy. Now it's no secret that for a long time I thought that was a load of hooey. As far as I could see the glee club was nothing but a place where a bunch of cowardly losers go to sing their troubles away and delude themselves into thinking that they live in a world that cares one iota about their hopes and dreams, totally divorced from the harsh reality that in the real world there's not much more to hope for than disappointment, heartbreak, and failure. And you know what. I was exactly right. Thats exactly what glee club is. But I was wrong about the cowardly part. What I finally realized, now that I'm well into my late thirties, it takes a lot of bravery to look around you and see the world not as it is but as it should be. A world where the quarterback becomes best friends with the gay kid, and the girl with the big nose ends up on Broadway. Finding the courage to open up your heart and sing about it. That's what glee club is. And for the longest time I thought that was silly, and now I think it's just about the bravest thing that anyone could do.

Sue

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.

Rachel