Favorite Carlos Solis Quotes
Every time you offer me afternoon sex it's because you want something, and it's not afternoon sex.
You and me, we're doing a tango.
Gabrielle: If you ever hurt me again, I will kill you.
Carlos: If you ever leave me for another man, I'll kill you.
Gabrielle: Boy, with all this passion, isn't it a shame that we're not having sex?
Carlos: Hey, I didn't say we had to stop. I just said we had to be quiet.
Edie: What? I suppose we should tiptoe around like schoolchildren so our parents don't catch us doing it? I feel like I'm 12 again.
Carlos: I'm just saying, I don't think that the whole world needs to know our..(Realizing what Edie just said) 12?
Dale: I got kinda held up in Florida longer than I thought.
Carlos: Spring break, right?
Dale: Yeah. Oh man, we were wasted twenty-four seven! Then I got the message and I just thought my friends were messin' with me. Those buttwads!
Carlos: My mama worked her fingers to the bone for me!
Gabrielle: That's what put her in an early grave! (long pause) Well that and the hit and run thing...
Gabrielle: I don't understand. How could you not know you're Mexican? We eat Mexican food all the time!
Juanita: We eat Chinese food, too. Does that mean I'm Chinese?
Carlos: No, that just means your mother hates to cook.
Carlos: Damn it!
Gabrielle: Whatever it is, I can explain.
Carlos: What about the baby, Gabrielle, huh? What about my baby?
Gabrielle: Oh, your baby?
Carlos: Fine. Our baby. Hey, we're a family now. This baby needs its mother and its father.
Gabrielle: Oh, Carlos. Whoever said you were the father?
Carlos: You've been paying more attention to your food than you have to me lately.
Gabrielle: I plan on getting really fat as a tribute to your mother
Gabrielle: So just to be clear, some slutty cheerleader gets knocked up by the soccer coach behind the local gas 'n gulp, and she is going to make sure we're quality people?
Carlos: You don't need to answer that.
Carlos: Do you have to be so high-maintenance?
Gabrielle: You married a model, Carlos. Maintenance is my only skill!
