Favorite Chandler Bing Quotes
Phoebe: Hey, you know what I just realised? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J'. Coincidence?
Chandler: Hey, that's 'joincidence' with a 'C'.
Ross: The doctor got the 'K' out. He also found a 'M' and an 'O'.
Chandler: We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY'.
Joey: (Walking into Central Perk) 95, 96, 97. See, I told you! Less than 100 steps from our place to here.
Chandler: You've got way too much free time.
Monica: I can't believe you. You still haven't told that girl she doesn't have a job yet?
Chandler: Well, you still haven't taken down the Christmas lights.
Monica: Congratulations, I think you've found the world's thinnest argument.
Chandler: I'm just trying to find the right moment, you know?
Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldn't be so hard, now that you're dating.
Ross: (About his new beeper) No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. I mean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
Chandler: A cool phone number, and a possible name for the kid.
Shelley: Hey gorgeous, how's it going?
Chandler: Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights... does it get better than this?
Monica: Do you guys ever think Alan might be a little too Alan.
Rachel: No, you can never be too Alan.
Ross: It's his innate Alan-ness that we adore.
Chandler: I could personally stand about a gallon of Alan.
Ross: I figured after work, I'd pick up a bottle of wine, go over there, and try to... woo her.
Chandler: Hey, you know what you should do? Take her back to the 1980's when that phrase was last used.
Ross: A thumb?
Phoebe: I know. I know. I opened it up, and there is was, just floating in there, like this tiny little hitch-hiker.
Chandler: Maybe it's a contest, you know, like, "collect all five."
Ross: I can't believe you two had sex in her dream!
Chandler: I-I'm sorry... it was a one time thing, I was very drunk and it was someone else's subconscious...
Phoebe: There's five hundred extra dollars in my account.
Chandler: Oh, Satan's minions at work again...
(Thinking) It's okay, all I have to do, is reach over, and put it back in my mouth... (Finds gum and puts it in his mouth) Good save! We're back on track, and I'm... chewing someone else's gum. This is not my gum! Oh my God, oh my God!... And now you're choking.
