(drunk) I'm nice. I'm pretty and smart! I'm a catch!

Carrie: The longer I sat at that table, the more alone I felt. And it really hit me: I am 35 and alone!
Miranda: You are not alone.
Carrie: No, I know I have you guys, but...and really, I hate myself a little for saying this, but...it felt really sad not to have a man in my life who cares about me. No special guy to wish me happy birthday. No goddamn soulmate. And I don't even know if I belive in soulmates.
Charlotte: Don't laugh at me, but maybe we could be each others soulmates? And then we could let men be just these great nice guys to have fun with?
Samantha: Well, that sounds like a plan.
Carrie: I'm 35. 35 is not 25.
Miranda: Thank God!
Carrie: I'm 35!
Samantha: Oh, shut the f*** up. I'm 140!

Charlotte: Stop it! You're not gonna clean up at your own shower.
Laney's friend: Yeah relax, cause once little Todd or Shayla comes around, you'll never stop cleaning up.
Charlotte: Shayla? Did you say Shayla?
Laney's friend: It's so unique, isn't it?
Charlotte: It's so my name!
Laney's friend: I thought your name was Charlotte.
Charlotte: No, it's not my name, it's my name! My secret baby name that I made up when I was eleven years old for my daughter when I had her. I told you. Don't tell me you don't remember.
Laney: No I'm sorry. I really don't.
Carrie: (voiceover) A complete lie. She remembered. We all remembered. Charlotte had made us all swear never to use it.
Laney: Anyway I think my husband heard it somewhere else.
Charlotte: Really, where, because I didn't tell him.
Laney: I can't believe you're freaking out over a name.
Laney's friend: I mean, you're not even pregnant.
Charlotte: That's not the point!
Samantha: (joining) What's going on?
Charlotte: She stole my baby name.
Samantha: You bitch! Let's go.

Samantha: Hi, my name is Samantha and I am a love-aholic.
Carrie, Miranda and Charlotte: Hi, Samantha!

Charlotte: We've been trying to you know...
Samantha: Fuck?
Charlotte: Whatever! And it's just not....
Samantha: Getting big and hard?
Carrie: What is this dirty mad libs?
Charlotte: I love him, but it's so frustrating.
Miranda: Of course it is.
Charlotte: I mean, last night I got so turned on I almost....
Samantha: Hey, you almost masturbated, he almost got it up, together you almost had sex.

Charlotte is trying to decide whether to have anal sex with a man she's dating.
Miranda: It all depends on how much you like him?
Charlotte: A lot.
Miranda: "Dating a few months until somebody better comes along a lot", or "marrying him and moving to the East Hampton's" a lot?
Charlottte: I don't know, I'm not sure.
Miranda: Well, you better get sure real quick.
Charlotte: You're scaring me.
Carrie: Don't scare her.
Miranda: It's all about control. If he goes up there, there's gonna be a shift in power, either he'll have the upper hand or you will. Now there's a certain camp that believe whoever holds the dick, holds the power. (Cab Driver turns around) Hello, you're driving! The question is, if he goes up your butt, will he respect you more or respect you less? That's the issue.
Cab Driver: No smoking in cab.
Carrie: Sir, were talking "up the butt", a cigarette is in order.
(Cuts to Samantha now in the cab)
Samantha: Front. Back. Who cares? A hole is a hole.
Miranda: Can I quote you?
Samantha: Don't be so judgmental. You could use a little back door.
Charlotte: I'm not a hole.
Carrie: Honey, we know.
Samantha: Look, all I'm saying is this is a physical expression, that the body, well, it was designed to experience. And p.s., it's fabulous.

(Before Carrie goes on her first offical date with Mr. Big, she's showing the girls what she's wearing)
Samantha: Hey honey, it's fabulous. Bravo!
Miranda: It's tits on toast, baby. But you make it work.
Charlotte: Well, let's just say it. It's the 'naked dress'. I mean, you're obviously going to have sex with him tonight.
Carrie: Come on, it's our first date.
Miranda: She's not gonna have sex. She's just gonna look like sex.
Carrie: That's right. I'm just the trailer.
Samantha: Please. If it happens, it happens. Bottoms up!
Charlotte: Wait a second, I thought you were serious about this guy, you can't sleep with him on the first date.
Samantha: Oh God!
Miranda: Here she goes again with 'The Rules.'
Samantha: The women who wrote that book they wrote it because they couldn't get laid, so they constructed this whole bullshit theory to make women who can get laid feel bad.

Charlotte: I've never done a number two at a guys place before.
Samantha: Honey, you're so uptight you need to do a number seven.

(the girls are jogging in the park)
Charlotte: Cute, who's that?
Miranda: An Ophthalmologist I once faked orgasms with.
Carrie: Ok, we're officially stopping.
Miranda: I only slept with him twice. The first time I faked it because it was never going to happen, and the second time I had to fake it because I faked it the first time.

Miranda: He goes to church with his mother? That can't be good.
Charlotte: Oh don't listen to her. A man who cares about his mother makes a wonderful husband.
Carrie: I think it's sweet.
Miranda: Sure, all religions are sweet, till you get to that shower-after-sex phase.
Charlotte: Oh my God! Is he still doing that?
Miranda: Please, it's amazing he has any skin left.
Carrie: Well, have you tried taking a shower with him?
Miranda: No! I'm afraid he'll pull out a garlic and a cross.

Charlotte: If I end up old and alone its all your fault.
Samantha: Charlotte, sweetie, we're all alone even when we're with men.

Miranda: Just don't fuck on a first date, you're fine.
Carrie: Third date.
Charlotte: Too soon!
Samantha: Reality check. A guy can just as easily dump you if you fuck him on the first date as he can if you wait until the tenth.
Miranda: When have you ever been on a tenth date?
Charlotte: And by then at least you're emotionally involved.
Samantha: Exactly. I mean, isn't it better to find out if the sex is good right off the bat, before anybody's feelings get hurt?