Claire: Luke, honey, come back I said I was sorry.
Luke: I'm 12, I need limits.

Phil: Hey momma bear, you okay?
Claire: Not with momma bear I'm not.

Claire: Could you grab an extra virgin-
Phil: I think one's enough for the sacrifice.

Sweetheart I would love to be wrong, but I don't live with the right people for that.

Phil: Guess it's just one of those things that we'll never know, like what really happened to the Titanic.
Claire: It hit an iceberg.
Phil: Maybe.

Claire: None of you believe me so I got proof. You should all be sucking it right now!
Gloria: Claire, please, enough with the sucking it! They're children!

Phil I think those are jazz shoes.

Turns out I've had my super-Dunphy all along.

I take my eye off the ball for one minute and I've got one kid in a coma, one with a black eye, and one running a crime ring.

I have 3 kids, I've been tired since 2005.

When did you two become such old women?

A minute you're just friends watching Falcon Crest and the next, you're lying underneath the air hockey table with your bra in your pocket

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley