Pam: So everyone here knows pirate code?
Creed: I understand it, I can't speak it.

Best Edward James Olmos costume I've ever seen...like freaky good.

Creed: Well I really, really, really liked it.
Andy: Well that really bums me out.
Creed: You're welcome.

Plumber: You're the guy who boo'd me.
Michael: Mmm. No. There were a lot of people booing you, I wasn't one of them.
Plumber: Uhh, I saw you. And you were the only one.
Michael: Get your eyes checked chuckle head.
Creed: Be cool Michael, I saw this guy kill a bunch of people.

Everywhere I look it's Betty White this and Betty White that. Finally a kid who's not talking about Betty White. Of course I follow him.

He's been trashing us relentlessly on Twitter. Now it's funny stuff, but mean.

I think we can all agree it's either Gabe or Angela. [Flips coin] It's Angela. Get her, boys.

I've done a lot more for a lot less.

You ever notice you can only ooze two things? Sexuality and pus. Man, I tell ya.

Have you tried making everything smaller?

Pam: So Santa, what can we expect from this party?
Phyllis: It's going to be a very jolly time if you've been good!
Creed: What if you've been bad?
Phyllis: Oh, then nothing but a lump of coal for you!
Creed: What if you've been really, really bad? Like more evil, and strictly wrong.
Jim: Okay, Creed, we covered it. Lump of coal.
Phyllis: Yeah ...

Guys, I'm starting to think Pam's not even pregnant.

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 97 in total

The Office Quotes

Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.

Michael

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

Andy
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