Your dress is a real booty call magnet. I got hit on twice, by women.

Jane: I hate it when you drive.
Maura: I hate it more when you undress and drive.

Eighteenth century beer sucks.

I'd love bunny pancakes.

Maura: Pine scent. It's right where her jacket pocket would be.
Jane: You think she was wearing air freshener?

Jane: Are you OK?
Maura: Yeah. Why?
Jane: Cause you're wearing two different shoes.

Maura: Males seek mates capable of nursing offspring. Abundant breasts do suggest...
Jane: You know what his abundant belly suggest? Snowball's chance in hell.

You're holding me hostage. You think you have any right to ask me personal questions.

Maura: You okay?
Jane: What, because I saw my own personal boogie man today? No.

Jane: A hot air balloon ride?
Maura: Well, it's a rather unfortunate coincidence that I found a balloon full of teeth today but this is completely different.

Maura: Well what am I suppose to get you for your birthday?
Jane: What is that? The duck boat ride?

Maura: You still have pain?
Jane: No, I just like saying ow.