Five minutes ahead of schedule... Right on schedule.

Ryan: Did you see Saw?
Dwight: Of course I seesaw, Mose and I seesaw all the time.

Michael: Boner Bomb starring Jason Statham. Or go against type with an Eisenberg or Michael Cera.
Dwight: Movie idea?
Michael: Noooo...Saving the world has never been this hard.

I have no feeling in my fingers or penis, but I think it was worth it.

Salesman is king. As the best salesman I am king of kings. Oh, you say Jesus is king of kings? Well, what does that say to you about how I think of myself.

You couldn't handle my undivided attention.

Dwight: I can't believe you came.
Michael: That's what she said.

Just once, I'd like to be a puppet master and have nothing go wrong. Is that too much to ask?

Michael: I have dibs. Do you respect dibs?
Dwight: (scoffs) I'm not a barbarian.

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