Dwight Schrute Quotes
Dwight: It's a terrible idea.
Jim: What is?
Dwight: Them in there all together. They stay in there too long, they're gonna get on the same cycle. Wreak havoc on our plumbing.
Dwight: Do you think? Or do you know?
Ryan: I think.
Michael: They say a cluttered desk means a cluttered mind. I say an empty desk means an...
Dwight: Empty mind.
Michael: I was not going to say that.
Doctor: Does the area look red and swollen?
Dwight: That's what she said.
Michael: That's my joke — dammit, Dwight!
Dwight: Chu chu chu chu...
Jim: What are you doing?
Dwight: Vietnam sounds.
Dwight: Where are we going?
Jim: Chuck E. Cheese.
Michael: Chuck E. Cheese? Oh, I'm so sick of Chuck E. Cheese.
Jim: We're going to the hospital, Michael.
Michael: I know, I'm just saying.
Michael: Dwight, put the bottle down or you're fired!
Dwight: You can't fire me! I don't work in this van!
Michael: Dwight, what's your middle name?
Dwight: Danger.
Michael: Something with a 'K'.
Jim: It's Kurt. Wow, I'm so sad I know that.
Jim: So where are you shipping your foot?
Michael: Ha ha ha. So where are you shipping...
Dwight: YOUR foot?
Angela: Hey, come inside and talk to me.
Dwight: I can't! Do you want us to run aground, woman?
Captain Jack: I need a volunteer to come up and hold my stick.
Dwight: Me me me!
Captain Jack: Ah. Usually it's a woman.
Dwight: I'm stronger.
Dwight: Don't worry Michael, I'm taking us to shore!
Michael: It's a fake wheel, dummy!
