Jules: Wine now - no no, I need big Joe.
Ellie: (to Lourie) Man hands help me.

Ellie: Honey, why don't you go to your crazy place?
Jules: I don't want to.

Ellie: Oh! Stan walked!
Jules: Now is not the time.
Ellie: Right.

If we're gonna be sneaking around the neighborhood at night should my husband be dressed like a cat burglar ?

I was so stunned! Do I give off a vibe that I'm friendly?

Jules: Harsh. But, Ellie and I have a pact.
Ellie: We tell each other the harsh truth no matter what.

Ellie: Are you Cuban today?
Andy: I will be if you like it.
Ellie: Yeah I like it.

Jules: Come on, gimmie a reason. Crack the code!
Ellie: Why did they take so long to tell you?

Jules: I'm starting a new list. Most boring game?
Ellie: Penny can.

Don't hate the player, hate the game, yo!

Ellie: I love pretending that I'm better than everybody else.
Travis: Who do you think I got it from.
Ellie: Awe.

(to Laurie about the pumpkin) Wow, it's like you on a Saturday night.

Cougar Town Quotes

Jules: You see that young gentleman there, I'd love to lick his body
Woman: That's my son
Jules: Ooh, he looks smart

Jules: When a 40-something guy gets divorced, it's always: "Way to go, Tiger!"
Grayson: We don't call each other Tiger. It's always Champ, or Samurai.