Favorite Gabrielle Solis Quotes
Thank you for sending my husband to prison, Bree. Nice work!
Gaby
Gabrielle: Look, I think we all know that Karl is a dog. But let's face it, if these tramps were laying out the buffet, he wouldn't be chowing down!
Susan: Well, every situation is different and it's hard to judge until we know all the details. (all four women stare at Susan)
Susan: Which obviously I don't know, because how would I know. (the women continue staring at Susan)
Susan: She's a slutty, slutty whore, absolutely! (All the women smile and nod)
Edie: Yeah!
Carlos: Damn it!
Gabrielle: Whatever it is, I can explain.
(Gabrielle is showing the young girls how to do the walk for the pageant)
Gabrielle: All right, girls, first things first if you can't walk you can't win, (to Vern): Hit it Vern.
(Vern plays the music, Gabrielle starts a very sexy walk)
Gabrielle(to the girls): Remember, eyes forward shoulders back hips square, look left(turns head left) look right(turns head right) (to the front) whip and walk.
(turns around and walks back, the girls look at her with their jaws dropped)
Gabrielle: Yes, I'm unbelievable close your mouths. (The girls close their mouths)
Susan: You fantasize about other men when you're with Carlos?
Gabrielle: Honey, Carlos has been so many different men, I'm actually surprised when I open my eyes and it's Carlos.
(to Susan) Just so you know, if I was a lesbian, I'd totally do you.
I thought maybe for a second that Susan Mayer lady and I might be friends, but then she started talking.
Gaby
Carlos: What about the baby, Gabrielle, huh? What about my baby?
Gabrielle: Oh, your baby?
Carlos: Fine. Our baby. Hey, we're a family now. This baby needs its mother and its father.
Gabrielle: Oh, Carlos. Whoever said you were the father?
Carlos: You've been paying more attention to your food than you have to me lately.
Gabrielle: I plan on getting really fat as a tribute to your mother
Gabrielle: Are you sleeping with John Rowland?
Ana: He's my boss.
Gabrielle: And the oscar goes to... Not you!
Lynette: (holding a worldmap) There you go, Gaby. It's kinda old. It's from before the Soviet Union broke up.
Gabrielle: The Soviet Union broke up?
Tom: You sure you know what you're doing with this homeschooling thing?
Gabrielle: Oh, honey, Juanita's in first grade. She'll believe what I tell her.
Gabrielle: Let me tell you something, Mrs. Peterson. I am pulling Juanita out of this crappy, crappy school! Come on, Carlos!
Mrs. Peterson: Crappy, huh? What a shame Juanita won't be here to blurt that out during the Pledge of Allegiance!
Gabrielle: Oh, yeah? Well, here's a blurt for ya: (@!#$%^&*!?) ... and the horse you rode in on!
