Between your genius and my nothing we make a great team, come on give me a hug!

Fine, we'll both go, and if anyone asks you something you don't understand, just say protons.

Ok Marge we can go to the circus, maybe I can finally find out why a man would think a stool is a proper defense against a lion.

I don't have time for childish games. If I don't do my job, atoms go boom!

Well I guess we've learned that of all the countless planets in the universe, we have evolved into the most inedible species. Like three bean salad at a barbecue, we will remain untouched.

Lisa

Marge: Homer, you have to stop dropping your pants for everyone who claims they're a doctor.
Homer: Fine.

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Wow, this place is completely alien, but everything's in English, just like Canada!

Homer: Look at all these knobs and buttons. They're clearly a superior race. Maybe that means they'll be nice to us.
Lisa: You mean like Europeans were to the Native Americans or the Belgians were to The Congo?
Homer: That's right, pick the only two times in history where things got messy.

What the? This isn't Halloween.

Thank you magical creatures of the mall! You have all taught me a Christmas message I'll never forget. The place to get drunk is at home.

You're all right stupid Flanders, you're all right.

Homer: Yeah, but doesn't the money go to schools?
Apu: You have been to our schools, what do you think?

The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

Homer: Aw, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut!
Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
Homer: Explain how!
Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services.