Favorite Jeff Greene Quotes
Lucy: Here's to The Vagina Monologues.
Jeff: Hey, here's to the vagina
Jeff: You really love that dog.
Larry: It's nice to be affectionate to something German. You don't get the opportunity that often, you know.
Jeff: I took a bullet for ya.
Susie: Well it was a bike, technically.
I wouldn't go around quoting "good Hodgkin's" based on Party of Five.
What the fuck were you thinking!? A picture of Bush, who gives a flying fuck! I'd fuck her with a Bush mask on!
What do you mean you want a helicopter ride?
Everybody's getting a chance to get divorced except me.
You have far more bald professionals than the average person.
Larry: (on Antoinette) Her boyfriend broke up with her, and frankly, I'd like to do the same.
Jeff: Why don't you fire her?
Larry: I can't.
Jeff: Why not?
Larry: Because she knows everything about me. She knows my dietary habits. She knows all about my web of lies and bullshit and deceit.
Jeff: How did she die?
Larry: Killed herself.
Jeff: No, she didn't!
Larry: Killed herself!
Jeff: Why?
Larry: Why? Nobody knows, she didn't leave a note. That is so rude, isn't that?
Jeff: That is really rude
Jeff: Steve the choreographer--you've been spending a lot of time with him?
Larry: I probably picked up some of his mannerisms.
Jeff: Some? All! You're him! You're Steve the gay choreographer!
Larry: Your mother thinks I touched her breast? That is so sick!
Jeff: It's what she thinks. What can I say? Sweet dreams.
Larry: "Sweet dreams". I'll dream about fucking your mother. "Sweet dreams".
