Favorite Jeff Greene Quotes
Larry: Scrabble?
Jeff: I'd love to play Scrabble!
Larry: I said it and kind of got in the mood.
You weigh like 8 pounds. What do you know about food?
Larry: (noticing a child's enormous penis) What's going on with this kid?
Susie: Ahhh!
Jeff: Wow!
Cheryl: Honestly, it's huge.
It's like eating a delicious sponge!
Larry: Going to his pool party?
Jeff: Yeah I am. Yeah I am.
Larry: Wearing a bathing suit? Going swimming?
Jeff: Speedo!
Jeff: A dog! She chose a fucking dog over her own father.
Larry: You sat down and you laid it out?
Jeff: I talked to her. I told her, 'Daddy's sick. He can't stay in the same house with Oscar.' She wants Oscar! She wants the dog!
Larry: Calm down
Jeff: Where is the dog?!
Larry: They took him back to your house.
Jeff: My house? No, no, no, his house. His house. I'm at the W hotel. It's his house now.
If you're gonna be a maniac, pyro's not a good maniac
Larry: You know how bookstores make you feel stupid?
Jeff: Yeah.
Larry: Well health food stores make me feel really unhealthy.
Susie: Jeffrey, who's there?
Jeff: Larry.
Susie: (hushed) Carmelita, put Oscar in the bedroom, and close the door.
Larry: I hope I can do this. She's fierce.
Jeff: Okay, at first thought it was my imagination, but you're talking really gay.
Larry: How long do you think I'd want to do that for?
Jeff: I don't know? All night long, I would assume.
Larry: It gets boring, come on.
Jeff: Fucking's boring?!
Larry: I waved to a guy in a Prius and he didn't wave back.
Jeff: I don't wave to people in the same car as me.
Larry: We're Prius drivers; we're a special breed.
