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Parenthood

Honey, there's a file on my computer, that I made for the kids. I want to make sure the kids have it. Can you make sure of that?

Well, to be honest. We bribe 'em. If I were on Oprah, I'd be like, "it's the incentive system," but really it's just bribery.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm smoking pot. I was just dopin' it up and I'm really sorry.

Adam: I'm sure he's going to be fine, honey. Crosby said he was going to 'totes' handle it.
Kristina: I don't know what that means, 'totes' handle it.

Kirstina: I need my personal space, Haddie. I'm totally fine.
Haddie: I'm here to help you, mom, and I need you to give me something to do.
Kristina: Give your dad a hug.

Kristina: I will talk to him. I'm sorry. We can still go to Funkytown!
Adam: Okay!

Kristina: You shouldn't have called those kids losers.
Adam: I know.
Kristina: They're not losers. They're jackasses.

Wow! They're from Bob. I'm just kidding. They're from your mom.

She's going to need an entire winter wardrobe, too. She doesn't even own mittens.

Displaying quotes 19 - 27 of 63 in total