Malory: Ray, find Cherlene. No matter what happens, we can't leave without her.
Lana: She said, suddenly oddly maternal.

Malory: I need some more ice. Oh, and a small bowl, a mirror, a needle and thread, and a straight razor.
Lana: You're not emasculating Krieger!

Malory: Are you bothering them?
Lana: I am. And also, Happy Opposite Day

Malory: If we miss that taping, I won't be responsible for my actions.
Lana: Are you ever?

Malory: Well, she won't go to rehab and you won't let her die with dignity...
Lana: From an overdose of cocaine cake?!

Silence - yes! Aspire to that while I think of a plan.

Lana: Have you ever heard a country song?
Archer: Uhhh...Danger Zone?

Lana: Right about here is the part where I hold you responsible.
Archer: Oh my God, the burden.

Lana: If anything goes wrong, I'm holding YOU responsible.
Archer: Yeah, that'll teach me.

Archer: It's the A-Team meets Scarface. That makes me...uh...
Lana: Hannibal Montana?

Archer: I realize now that I was mistaken
Lana: Aww, what a scary new feeling for you.

Lana: I could start smoking crak today and he'd still turn out better than you.

Archer: Why is that, because I never had a father, Lana? So why don't you shut up and then also marry me?!

Archer Quotes

Cheryl: What the stupid shit are you doing??
Cyril: You said you wanted watermelon.
Cheryl: Watermelon's red?
Cyril: Yes. How do you not know that?
Cheryl: Who am I? Charles Frederick Andress?

Cyril: Archer, do something!
Archer: Who am I, Alan Turing? He was also in X-Men, remember?