Leonard: Still arguing which is the best CSI?
Howard: We agreed they all have their merits.

I'm still not adjusted to how SyFy spells their name now. S-Y-F-Y... that's siffy.

Sheldon: I'm not aware of the acronym KMN.
Leonard: From the context we think it means 'kill me now.'

Leonard: How do you get an entire lecture hall to flip you off at the same time?
Howard: Apparently if you're Sheldon all you have to do is turn your back.

Penny: What if I got him to apologize and promise to behave?
Leonard: Then I guess we would let him back on the app team and while we're doing that, you can take an aerial tour of L.A. on your flying pig.

Leonard: It's what we do. We give each other a hard time. Hey, Sheldon, you look like a praying mantis.
Sheldon: That was very hurtful.

You actually want to deceive your father with some sort of sham, playacting and kissing? Because I'm good with that.

Sheldon: And here's where we are -- the runts in a large litter unlikely to ever reach the nourishing teats of Indiana Jones.
Leonard: So it's good we stopped for dinner.

Leonard: Hi. I'm Leonard. You are beautiful. You pop, sparkle and buzz electric. I'm going to pick you up at eight, show you a night you will never forget.
Raj: Where are we going?

Raj: Woh, woh, woh! I don't want to speak to the FBI.
Leonard: Why not?
Raj: I'm brown and I talk funny.

Leonard: You put moths in my food!?
Sheldon: For science.

Leonard: You know what happens when you yawn in public...
Sheldon: Everyone will see my oddly shaped uvela.

TBBT Quotes

Raj: Well, to paraphrase Shakespeare: It's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography.
Penny: Oh... you poor baby.
Raj: What's wrong with me, Penny?
Penny: Nothing, nothing. You know, if we weren't friends - and you hadn't brought up that creepy pornography story - I'd be on you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy.
Raj: Hey, you totally got that right. E = MC squared.
Penny: I listen. I have no idea what it means, but I listen.

Sheldon: I recently read that during World War Two, Joseph Stalin had a research program to create supersoldiers by having women impregnated by gorillas.
Howard: What a sick use of science.
Raj: Hey, as long as the baby's healthy.
Amy: I wonder if Stalin considered any other animals.
Leonard: Hippos are the deadliest creature. A half-human, half-hippo soldier would be pretty badass.
Howard: Yes, but when they're hungry-hungry, you can stop them with marbles.
Sheldon: Yeah, the correct animal for interspecies supersolider is koala. You would wind up with an army so cute it couldn't be attacked.