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The-simpsons

He's just Ralph with a dream, the dream of not ralphing.

Bart: Don't want to be seen with you when you're hitting bottom.
Lisa: At least we hope it's bottom.

Lisa: Nobody form any opinions while I'm gone.
Chief Wiggum: Well, hurry! We have no minds of our own.

Lisa: How does this mean anything when everyone's forced to do it?
Marge: What did I say about pointing out the meaninglessness of things?
Lisa: Not to.

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Lisa: You could do what Everybody Loves Raymond did.
Krusty: Go off the air while I'm still good? That horse has left the stable, gone to the glue factory and has been used to make art projects.

Principal Skinner: I must say, Lisa, it was amusing to see you thoroughly de-high-horsed.
Lisa: That isn't a word.
Principal Skinner: Oooh, back on the saddle she climbs.

Excellent! (tents fingers) What am I doing? Untent! Untent!

Homer: I'm sorry, Homer Junior. You'll occupy an idealized place in my heart that no one can ever quite fill.
Bart: Therapy, please.
Lisa: Me too.

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Willie: You want me to carve it into a thank-o-lantern?
Lisa: No, this is good.
Willie: Well, this knave's got to carve something.

Lisa: Bart, why is the dad I've always wished for creeping me out?
Bart: I don't know, cause you're incapable of experiencing joy?
Lisa: Point taken.

Bart must not be judged by these kids. But by a jury...of kids, mostly these kids...there's only so many kids.

Lisa: Why does someone become a bully?
Jimbo: Neglect.
Dolph: Abuse.
Kearney: I'm a Cubs fan.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 438 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

Where's my burrito. Where's my burrito. Where's my burrito.

Homer

I'm married to the sea, and I'm seeing two of the great lakes on the side. I won't say which ones but it's ERIE how SUPERIOR they are.

Sea Captain
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