Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXFavorite Malory Quotes
Pam: The identity of every single ISIS field agent is on there!
Archer: So what?
Malory: Because most secret agents don't tell every harlot from here to Hanoi that they ARE secret agents.
Archer: Then why be one?
Gillette: My mother told me she loved me all the time.
Malory: Exactly, look how you turned out.
Gillette: Uh, with high self esteem?
Malory: I had a mammogram on Friday and they found something.
Pam: So is that why you're being such a bitch?
Malory: Guess how many pygmies died cutting it down? Hint: six.
Archer: How dirty do you think my junk is?!
Malory: As dirty as if it was made of dirt and then got dropped in some different dirt and then Pigpen came along and kicked it around with his dirty shoes.
Cyril: Kriegers father's was a Nazi scientist.
Malory: And JFK's father was a bootlegger.
Cyril: What!? That's like comparing apples to Nazi oranges.
Barry: He sodomized my fiancee.
Malory: You're still together?
Barry: Oh I'm sorry, ex-fiance. That's what I meant to say.
Malory: Then it wasn't it meant to be.
Archer: I'm hungry.
Malory: So lick that coat. You smell like a...
Archer: Grill cheese.
Malory: What?
Archer: Grill me a cheese.
Malory: I'm not grilling you a cheese!
Archer: (Begins sobbing)
Malory: Especially since this one went and got himself paralyzed
Ray: Yeah, that's me, mr. selfish
Krieger: My entire laboratory is at your disposal.
Malory: thanks I'll let you know if I need a hybrid pig-boy.
Please you'd do... name a noun
Malory: For god's sake woman, where is your pride?
Cheryl: In my work.
Malory: That made be the funniest thing you've ever said.
