Marshall Eriksen Quotes (Page 2)
Season 8, Episode 6: "Splitsville"
Marshall: Okay that's ridiculous! Is Nick a genius? No. But does he have average intelligence? No! But he is a human being with a heart!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 5: "The Autumn of Breakups"
Lily: Look Ted, it gets exhausting constantly giving people advice they haven't asked for, so I'm training Marshall
Marshall: My goal is to eventually say things that are so sassy and wise, that there is no possible response other than Mm or Mmhm. And if this is a place where we can share our dreams, I like to think that it is, I hope someday, to earn a...testify!
• Rating: 3.3 / 5.0
Ted: Why wouldn't she just come right out and say what she wants?
Marshall: Men! It's like if there weren't pickle jars to open and spiders to kill and computers to back up, what would be their point?
Lily: MmHm.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Ted: Victoria is happy we're taking things slow.
Marshall: Oh oh honey sweetie baby. No thirty-two year old woman is happy taking things slow. Trust me, Victoria has got friends from high school posting pictures of second babies on Facebook and you think girlfriend's all like, oh lets just bone a bunch so I'm another year older and still single? Bitch please!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 4: "Who Wants To Be A Godparent"
Marshall: You smell that? That's the smell of urine that isn't Marvin's.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 8, Episode 3: "Nannies"
Marshall: Does anyone have six 9-volt batteries?
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 2: "The Pre-Nup"
Lily: What are you bitches doing here?
Marshall: Lily!
Lily: Oh he's napping.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Lily: Marahall this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.
Marshall: I didn't put the bread in there, you didn't put the bread in there!
• Rating: 4.3 / 5.0
Marshall: Lily lika lika, the honka honka.
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0
Season 7, Episode 24: "The Magician's Code Part Two"
Marshall: We got a ten!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 315