Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS

Does anyone have six 9-volt batteries?

Lily: What are you bitches doing here?
Marshall: Lily!
Lily: Oh he's napping.

Lily: Marahall this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.
Marshall: I didn't put the bread in there, you didn't put the bread in there!

Lily lika lika, the honka honka.

We got a ten!

He is the manager of the Paramus Waldorf. You come to Paramus, we will hook you up!

All hail Beercules!

Marshall: Excuse me miss, when you get the chance can you bring me 100 shots of tequila please?
Barney: I'll have the same

Barney: The truth is I've spent the last five years trying to inception your wife.
Marshall: That movie only came out two years ago.
Barney: What movie?

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