Narrator Quotes (Page 7)
Season 1, Episode 16: "Altar Egos"
Michael: Boy, the lengths you'll go to sleep with a woman.
Gob: Believe me, we didn't do any sleeping. I had sex last night.
Narrator: But he really didn't.
Gob: Yes, I did.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 1, Episode 15: "Staff Infection"
White Power Bill: No more teaching from you.
George Sr.: No teaching, no teaching.
Narrator: It was at that moment that George Sr. reunited with his son-in-law.
George Sr.: Tobias, what the hell are you doing here?
Tobias: I'm here to study with you. To learn from you. Teach me.
George Sr.: There's no teaching. There's no teaching.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 1, Episode 14: "Shock and Aww"
Narrator: Michael was sharing his bed for the first time in years ... unfortunately, it was with his younger brother, Buster.
• Rating: Unrated
Narrator: But Gob mistook Michael's basic human decency for a romantic interest, and felt a competitive urge to step in.
• Rating: Unrated
Ms. Baerly: Oh, hi. Hi, George Michael. I was just looking at this model home. I'm going to go home and think about it. I'm going to go home and think about it.
George Michael: Dad, what was she doing here? I mean, she wasn't ...
Narrator: Michael knew he had an ethical responsibility to tell his son the truth.
Michael: Yes. Your Uncle Gob slept with her.
• Rating: Unrated
Narrator: So, George Michael, still angry at Gob, sought out the family expert on making trouble.
Maeby: I know he was dating that girl Shannon.
George Michael: The cheerleader?
Maeby: Yeah, she's probably going to take him to that stupid Diversity Dance. I wish I had someone shocking to take. You know, I actually called Mr. Daniels and asked him, but he got all out of breath and dropped the phone. I never heard back.
George Michael: You know, maybe we should go together. All right, I mean, it's a bad example, I just ... but should we?
• Rating: Unrated
Season 1, Episode 13: "Beef Consomme"
Maeby: I'm glad to have this family, you know. 'Cause I know I said some bad stuff, but it's much better here than it was in Boston. And I have a cousin here, so even if my parents do get divorced, I have you, right?
Narrator: George Michael realized that no matter how much it upset him, he didn't want to take Maeby's family away from her.
George Michael: Yeah, you got us all right.
Maeby: Now, all I need is a boyfriend.
• Rating: Unrated
Narrator: On the next Arrested Development, Tobias quietly overcompensates.
(Tobias enters the dining room, where Michael, Lindsey, Buster, and GOB are having breakfast, totally nude and streaching his arms)
Tobias: Please, tell me there's some coffee left. (Pours a cup of coffee.) I slept very well last night. (Kisses Lindsey on the cheek and leaves.)
• Rating: Unrated
Season 1, Episode 12: "Marta Complex"
Narrator: The family continued to chant "speech, speech, speech" for no one in particular.
(clapping ceases)
Michael: Gee, after all that, I was kinda hoping somebody would make a speech.
Buster: Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech!
Michael: I'll say something.
Gob: Typical.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Narrator: And suddenly Buster realized Marta was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Buster: I've been dating an old lady.
• Rating: Unrated
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Total Quotes: 95