Narrator Quotes
(referring to Michael) He was, however, getting along with his sister, which was unwelcome news to their mother who feared this unity might be used against her.
Narrator: Wayne Jarvis had become famous after an employment discrimination suit against the family's current attorney, Barry Zuckerkorn.
James Alan Spangler: It'll be a long time before Barry Zuckerkorn calls anyone a "homo" again.
Kitty: Your wife's on line one.
Narrator: Michael's wife had been dead for two years.
Michael: My what?
Narrator: Kitty realized her mistake.
Kitty: I said, 'your wife is on line one.'
Narrator: But not immediately.
Lindsay: What car? I don't know what you're talking about.
Michael: Dad's car. The one you didn't tell me that you had, even though I had to ride my bicycle to work all week.
Lindsay: Oh, Dad's car. Well, obviously, I'm going to use it if it's an emergency.
Narrator: Lindsay had such an emergency three days earlier when her salon was able to squeeze her in at the last moment.
Michael: Hey, I can't believe you. I asked you two weeks ago whether we should use Dad's car, and you said it would be bad form. Now, I hear you're driving it!
Gob: That is a lie. A bald-faced lie.
Narrator: Gob was lying. He had been driving his father's car.
Gob: All right, take this lock-pick, break into the permit office for me.
George Michael: I think I'd better check with my dad first.
Maeby: You're going to break into a permit office? Sweet. Can I come?
Narrator: And George Michael saw a chance to get closer to Maeby.
George Michael: You know, my dad hates to micromanage. Let's just do this.
Narrator: And Lucille was mingling with the elite of the Latino Television Academy.
Lucille: Can I get a vodka tonic, please? I'd like a vodka tonic, please. Vodka tonic, please. A sea of waiters, and no one will take a drink order.
Warden: You really think you can break out of my prison?
G.O.B.: You won't even know I was here.
Narrator: The warden was intrigued. Less about the stunt, and more about the prison beatings this brash magician was sure to receive.
Michael: Or, even better, could you mail this letter for me?
G.O.B.: You can't just give that to a mailman?
Michael: I can't trust a mailman with this. This is important.
Narrator: G.O.B. was intrigued. He also suspected he couldn't return a completely frozen dove to a pet store and get the full refund he felt he was entitled to.
G.O.B.: I'll mail that letter.
Narrator: George Michael's attempt to distance himself from his cousin proved ... unsuccessful.
(George Michael and Maeby are at the banana stand. Maeby dips her hand in the liquid chocolate and then licks her fingers.)
George Michael: I can't tell you how many health codes you're violating right now.
Narrator: Michael realized that his father had even taken control of the banana stand, but he still had some unanswered questions, so he did a little detective work.
Michael: You burn down the storage unit?
T-Bone: Oh, most definitely.
And so, Lindsay and Maeby separately went to the same restaurant to celebrate the jobs they hadn't actually performed, with money they hadn't actually earned.
