Phyllis Vance Quotes
Dwight: Who tipped you over? Was it Phillip?
Phyllis: It's my back.
Michael: It's her back. We just - We need - Let's - You know what?
Phyllis: Call a doctor.
Michael: We're going to take care of you. We're gonna get you help. Let's - come on.
Phyllis: No. Call Bob.
Andy: [Michael is holding the stereo speaker up to a vent - blaring "[Gonna Make You Sweat] Everybody Dance Now", spins in chair] Oww!
Phyllis: Aw, what the hell? [goes to Vance Refrigeration] Hi, Jessica. Is Bob in?
Jessica: Oh, he's on a call.
Phyllis: Oh, I'll just duck my head in.
Jessica: It's pretty important. He wouldn't want to be disturbed. Can I give him a message before he gets off?
Phyllis: Tell him I'm going dancing downstairs in the storage closet between the bathrooms that used to be a utility shower and he should join me there.
Jessica: I'll let him know.
Phyllis: Mmm-hmm.
Michael: Ok. Anyone? Anyone? At all? Accounting? I am accounting on you to go to lunch with me.
Angela: No. I don't want to stay late to have a two hour lunch.
Phyllis: Michael, we have a lot of work to do.
Michael: What?
Phyllis: Work.
Michael: Ugh! God! What happened to you people? [talking like a robot] We are just office drones. We are office drones. All we do is work... is work.
Dwight: Stanley, how do you feel about those two taking your clients?
Stanley: It's not right. I don't like it.
Dwight: He doesn't like it.
Phyllis: You don't take my clients away and give them to a secretary. [sighs] No offense, Jim. I think she's very pretty.
Dwight: Her face is okay, but-- Jesus! What --what are you doing here?
Meredith: I don't know. I saw a crowd. I thought there might be a dogfight or something--
Dwight: Get out! We need to do something. I'm thinking maybe a coup or we take Ryan hostage.
Pam: [laughs] Boscov's at the Steamtown Mall?
Phyllis: It sure looked good on the mannequin.
Pam: Well, you have good taste.
Phyllis: Well, thanks. I sure wish I had more time to talk to my clients, though.
Pam: What?
Phyllis: Isn't that what you said to a bunch of my clients when you were stealing them? That I didn't have enough time for them?
Pam: Oh, I, um...
Phyllis: Close your mouth, sweetie. You look like a trout.
Michael: Oscar, what were you going to say?
Oscar: Nothing. I didn't say anything.
Michael: All right.
Erin: Do I still have a job here?
Michael: Not important. Okay, alright. Yes. Yes, you have a job. Frankly, you have a job because Ryan and Pam are starting with us as salesmen.
Dwight: Wait, what?
Stanley: How is that going to work?
Michael: It's going to work very smoothly, because Pam and Ryan are bringing over a ton of clients from Michael Scott Paper Company and--
Phyllis: You mean the clients you stole from us.
Dwight: Yeah, aren't we getting those clients back?
Michael: No, you lost those clients.
Andy: I call foul, sir.
Michael: Okay.
Andy: The whole office feels darker, you know? It's just a sad dark day.
Phyllis: Andy, he's gone.
Andy: I know.
Phyllis: You don't have to kiss his ass anymore.
Stanley: Maybe you should go into your office, close the door, and make some calls about jobs?
Michael: I have a job.
Andy: For four more days.
Pam: Do you have any leads on a job?
Michael: Pam, what you don't understand is that at my level you just don't look in the want-ads for a job. You are head-hunted.
Jim: You called any headhunters?
Michael: Any good headhunter knows I am available.
Kelly: I could see our kids facing obstacles being half-Black and half-Indian, but it's so worth it, you guys.
Phyllis: It's just me here.
Charles: What exactly is the PPC?
Phyllis: Oh, that's the Party Planning Committee. They spend hours planning parties.
Pam: Jim uses a 6 pound ball.
Jim: That is a lie, that is a lie.
Pam: Yes, he bowled 5 frames with this pink sparkly thing until a little girl had to ask for her ball back.
Jim: But! That girl must've had monstrous hands because the holes fit.
Pam: No, you just have little dainty fingers.
Bob: Oh yeah. You can always model ladies' jewelry.
Jim: Nobody asked, Bob!
Bob: Everyone here who's bowled a 280 please raise your hand. [Bob does so]
Jim: No way, a 280?
Pam: Wow, that's impressive.
Phyllis: Okay. Now everyone here who's bowled under 70 raise their hand.
Jim: Yikes.
