Robin Scherbatsky Quotes
Robin: I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget how seriously you guys take American Thanksgiving. Real Thanksgiving happened over a month ago.
Barney: I'm sorry. Did you just say Canadian Thanksgiving was and I'm quoting "The Real Thanksgiving"? What do Canadians even have to celebrate about?
Barney: No way! March does not have 31 days!
Marshall: Yes it does! Everyone knows that. It's like general knowledge!
Ted & Robin [saluting]: General Knowledge!
Robin: Hey, can you hand me a Kleenex?
Ted: Actually, Kleenex is a brand. This is a facial tissue.
Marshall: [looking for his password] Jelly beans, fluffernutter, gummi bears, ginger snaps- this is a grocery list.
Robin: For who, a witch building a house in the forest?
Marshall: Sugar helps me study.
Barney: This is the kind of shopping a ten-year-old does when he's alone for the weekend.
Lily: Who leaves a 10 year old alone for the weekend?
Barney: And your mom was perfect.
Robin: I know what they were fighting about and it wasn't peanut butter.
Ted: I appreciate it, but there's a reason your name is Robin, not Batman.
Robin: They were fighting because they didn't get the loan and it's all Lily's fault.
Ted: What?
Robin: Yeah, she has a pile of debt the size of Mount... Rushmore.
Ted: There was a fight here.
Barney: What do you mean?
Ted: Whenever Marshall and Lily have a big argument, they always leave a trail of evidence all over the apartment.
Robin: Oh, God, here we go. He had a detective club as a kid.
Ted: Uh, the Mosby Boys cracked a lot of big cases.
Robin: The Mosby Boys? You mean you and your sister?
Ted: We solved the mystery of the missing retainer.
Robin: Let me guess: it was in the garbage?
Ted: Why are you like this?
Robin: What the hell are you doing? You can't buy this place. Lily, you have a debt the size of Mount Waddington.
Lily: Waddington?
Robin: It's the tallest mountain in Canada. It's like 4000 metres high.
Lily: Meters?
Lily: Hi. My name is Lily, and I'm a shopaholic.
Robin: Hi, Lily. Oh, you guys don't do that here? Sorry. Proceed.
Lily: I buy designer clothes and accesories that I can't afford. I have fifteen credit cards and they're all maxed out. And nobody outside this room, not even my husband, knows and I feel terrible because all I want to do right now is ask you where you got those shoes, they're adorable!
BlahBlah: So, we know how Marshall and Lily met. Robin, how did you and Barney meet?
Robin: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Barney and I are not together, no, no.
Barney: Really? Sixteen no's? Really?
Blahblah: You guys dated? For how long?
Robin: A year. But, don't worry. The relationship wasn't that good. At the end, it was mostly about sex. Which wasn't that good. I was the problem. I just lie there. But Ted is very good. He will get you where you need to go.
Lily: Dumped by a six-year-old.
Robin: Whatever, he's a stupid-head
Doug: You're supposed to pour the milk first!
Robin: No, you pour the cereal first to see how much milk you need!
Doug: It tastes better milk first!
Robin: It tastes the same!
Doug: Why are you wearing my dad's pants?
Robin: Milk first it is.
