Samantha Jones Quotes
Samantha: You know women dressing like men is very popular right now.
Carrie: And here I thought it was pokemon.
Charlotte: I don't have a goody drawer.
Carrie: Oh, everybody has a goody drawer.
Samantha: I have a goody closet.
Samantha: I'm telling you it was entrapment, false advertising and blantant discrimination. You can't just randomly go down on one person and not on another. I paid good money and expected to be eaten out.
Carrie: This is not the conversation I wish to have as my most amazing self.
Samantha: I can't believe that bitch is a no show.
Carrie: I'm the one whose sick. I charged another outfit I can't afford. I probably bounced a check to a charity just to prove I'm amazing. I never felt so...let's just go.
Samantha: I paid eighty-five dollars. We're having our two drinks. What do you feel like?
Carrie: Um, loser on the rocks.
Carrie: You know who those women marry? The Roman numeral guys.
Charlotte: (reading from the paper) Charles Duffy Anderson IV.
Carrie: Ding-ding-ding!
Samantha: I find the higher the number the worse the sex. I went out with somebody III who couldn't even get it up.
Miranda: Imagine how bad Henry VIII must have been.
Carrie: Yeah, you give him head, he cuts yours off!
Samantha: Look, sometimes for the right guy you have to make concessions. There's always gonna be something.
Carrie: Are you guys seriously advocating that I do this?
Samantha: Why not? He's a great looking, rich, political prince.
Carrie: Oh sure! It's practically a fairy tale, the princess and the pee.
I don't believe in the Republican Party or the Democratic Party. I just believe in parties.
Miranda: I would be very worried if I were you. The pee could just be foreplay.
Carrie: Oh, my God!
Miranda: Where there's smoke, I'm just saying....
Samantha: This is so typical of men in power. They just love to be dominated and humiliated.
Charlotte: What did you say when he asked you?
Carrie: Well I told him that I'd just gone, but maybe another time. But I really don't think that I can keep saying that forever.
Samantha: You shop at the Boy's Department.
Jeff: So what? The clothes fit me better, plus they're cheaper. Where do you shop, the Big and Tall Horse Store?
Samantha: Hmmhmm. You know, you're nothing but a big dick with a little man attached.
Jeff: You're nothing but a big pair of tits with too much extra leg room.
Samantha: (Bursts into laughter)
Carrie: (voiceover) Surprisingly, Samantha had found what she was really looking for, and it had nothing to do with size.
Jeff: Hey! Somebody get me a booster chair!
Carrie: (voiceover) She had found a man who made her laugh. They dated for two weeks. Though he was short, it was a very long relationship for Samantha.
Samantha: I would love to show him my lower Manhattan.
Charlotte: Eww!
Samantha: Look at his arms, they're huge.
Miranda: You know what they say, big arms...big arms.
Samantha: Hello, 911, I'm on fire.
Charlotte: This is an awfully long way to go to watch some firemen take their shirts off.
Samantha: Honey, I'm on the fucking ferry, I better see more than just peaks.
Samantha: Ladies, let me tell you about his cock.
Charlotte: Would you be quiet. The people at the next table have a child.
Samantha: Well, that's their choice.
Carrie: Little Miss Hangover is right. Can we lighten up on the cock talk until cocktail time?
