Kurt: Are we all set in there?
Santana: If by all set do you mean did I light the candy cane scented candles on the toilet, then yes, we're all set.

[to Starchild] Would you mind just stepping outside for a moment while I bitch slap some sense into my friend.

Santana: He was a much better person than I am.
Kurt: That is true. But Finn really cared about you. And I don't think he would've done all those things if he didn't think you were decent, too.

Okay, I know that Finn had his doubts about God, but I am convinced that Squishyteets is up in Heaven right now, plopped down next to his new best friend Fat Elvis, helping themselves to a picnic of baby back ribs smothered in butterscotch pudding and tater tot grease. So, this is for you, Hudson.

Sue: I don't care for your attitude.
Santana: Well I don't give a hot wet monkey's ass what you care for.

Santana: You wanted that memorial gone because you're such a cold-hearted bitch.
Sue: What did you just call me?
Santana: A miserable, self-centered bitch who has spent every waking minute of the past three years trying to make our lives miserable. I'm officially over it.

Isn't it amazing how life seems so easy when you just don't give a fart? I mean look at this. Hummel is getting married. Berry is just full of confidence. And I finally have a girlfriend who I don't have to worry about straying for penis.

I mean, if you're producing that much yeast you should probably start a bakery.

[to Rachel] Okay, no, come on. You are not playing Yenta the lesbian matchmaker.

Rachel, that's Gunther. [whispers] Don't tell him if you're Jewish or black.

Santana: You're acting like a completely different person and it's making me sad.
Brittany: Well get over it because sadness is stupid.

The last thing I want to do is pay 30 grand a year to get a degree for doing something that I'm already freaking Wonder Woman at.

Glee Quotes

You know, a great big fat person once stood on this stage and told a group of a dozen or so nerds in hideous disco outfits that glee, by its very definition, is about opening yourself up to joy. Now it's no secret that for a long time I thought that was a load of hooey. As far as I could see the glee club was nothing but a place where a bunch of cowardly losers go to sing their troubles away and delude themselves into thinking that they live in a world that cares one iota about their hopes and dreams, totally divorced from the harsh reality that in the real world there's not much more to hope for than disappointment, heartbreak, and failure. And you know what. I was exactly right. Thats exactly what glee club is. But I was wrong about the cowardly part. What I finally realized, now that I'm well into my late thirties, it takes a lot of bravery to look around you and see the world not as it is but as it should be. A world where the quarterback becomes best friends with the gay kid, and the girl with the big nose ends up on Broadway. Finding the courage to open up your heart and sing about it. That's what glee club is. And for the longest time I thought that was silly, and now I think it's just about the bravest thing that anyone could do.

Sue

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.

Rachel