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The-big-bang-theory

Sheldon: Is there any reason you're keeping this dead goldfish?
Penny: Damn, I forgot to feed him and that I had him.
Sheldon: Well, now, did you also have a dog? Because I found what appears to be a battery-operated chew toy.
Penny: Party's over. Party's over.

Bernadette's diary has some saucy bits.

Amy: Used me as a human shield?
Sheldon: I panicked. He looked taller than usual.

My shirt is itchy and I wish I were dead.

I can't tell you that. I'm bound by closet organizer/organizee confidentiality.

Sheldon: I found three bowling pins. Do you juggle these or are you missing seven?
Howard: Juggle.
Sheldon: You health nuts kill me.

Bernadette: Sheldon, I've been cooking all day.
Sheldon: Well ... now don't you feel silly.
Bernadette [to Howard]: Show him the closet

Amy: Sheldon ... all Snow White needs is one small kiss to wake up.
Sheldon: Heard you the first time.

Hello, female children.

Sheldon: I believe in a gender blind society like in Star Trek. Where women and men of all races and creeds worked side-by-side as equals.
Leonard: You mean where they were advanced enough to develop an interstellar warp drive, but a black lady still answered the space phone?

Leonard: Helping women?
Sheldon: Helping anyone. People should take care of themselves.
Leonard: Oh, like yesterday when you made me drive you to the dry cleaners, the pharmacy and the post office?

How can she remember all those lines, but as a waitress she can't remember "no tomato" on my hamburger?

Displaying quotes 157 - 168 of 703 in total

TBBT Quotes

Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter, if you're in a pinch.

Sheldon

Leonard: Hi. I'm Leonard. You are beautiful. You pop, sparkle and buzz electric. I'm going to pick you up at eight, show you a night you will never forget.
Raj: Where are we going?

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