The Big Bang Theory

Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
The big bang theory

Sheldon: Careful, Amy. The friend of my enemy's girlfriend is my enemy.
Amy: Really?
Sheldon: Yes. You're either with me or against me.
Amy: Do you want to take the bus to work?
Sheldon: Maybe there's a third option.

Sheldon: Now I think I hear kissing.
Amy: Like you know what kissing sounds like.
Sheldon: There's kissing in Star Trek, smarty-pants.

Sheldon: Amy, there were Chinese food containers ... in the trash can.
Amy: Poor Leonard.

Don't try to trick me into buying something I don't want. Now, let's talk Aquaman.

Now, I know how you felt getting mauled by that sex-crazed gorilla.

Sheldon: Well, if it's any consolation, i'm sure Leonard's tormented every moment he's away from your warm embrace and cherry lips.
Penny: Thanks.
Sheldon: Oh, seriously?

Penny: You know what the worst part is?
Sheldon: That you're having to process your emotional pain without vodka?
Penny: No. Yeah....

Penny: I cannot believe we were missing that jerk.
Sheldon: You were.

Penny: I'm calling him.
Sheldon: Oh, goodie! Put him on speaker phone.

Sheldon: Even the dung beetle chooses to plot its course by using the Milky Way.
Raj: Is that true?
Sheldon: Everything I say is true. Now, of course, the dung beetle also enjoys eating fece, living in feces and making little balls out of feces. So, pick and choose which aspects of its lifestyle you want to embrace.

It did not kill me when you went to space. Monkeys went to space.

Penny: Oh gosh, Sheldon, the genius, is jealous of Leonard.
Sheldon: I'm not jealous. I'm just very unhappy that good things are happening for him and not happening for me.

Displaying quotes 145 - 156 of 727 in total

TBBT Quotes

Leonard: What? You're afraid of both dinosaurs and chickens.
Sheldon: Yes, but tell me a dinosaur chicken salad sandwich wouldn't hit the Mesozoic spot.

Leonard: Hi. I'm Leonard. You are beautiful. You pop, sparkle and buzz electric. I'm going to pick you up at eight, show you a night you will never forget.
Raj: Where are we going?

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