You proved that it's never too late to turn your life around.

In the last week, you either enjoyed a delicious curry or a hug from Principal Figgins.

I spend the day vibrating with wide irrational rage.

I doubt your avian frame could withstand the rigors of childbirth.

The English language lacks the requisite words to express just how much I dislike you.

You can maybe go one day without the driving clothes. It's a wheel chair Artie, not a Porsche.

For God's sake, Amelia, it's 2012. If you wanna marry Will Schuester, ask him.

I made plans to shoot reindeer from my helicopter with Sarah Palin, but she canceled. Apparently Todd gets fussy when she misses his ballet recitals.

Christmas is a time for forgiveness. I have decided to forgive you for having no talent and ruining the American songbook, one mash-up at a time.

Why don't you hurry on to your next face-widening session at the John Travolta Institute for Head Thickening and Facial Weight Gain?

Truth is, journal, I'm attracted to men. Sure, I can't stand watching them eat or talk, but when it comes to getting sexy, this gal's got a hole in her heart that only a fella can fill.

My iPhone 5 is vibrating. That's a new feature of the iPhone 5, they vibrate now.

Glee Quotes

[to Kurt] You know, these Mounds bars are delicious, but you have to eat them. If you just hold them in your hand hoping that you might get to eat them one day, they're going to melt and you'll look like somebody just pooped in your hand. Don't let waiting for things to maybe work out with Blaine turn you into the guy who looks like somebody just pooped in their hand.

Brittany

Blaine: Where's the bed?
Brittany: I removed it because when I imagined you two having sex I imagined a U-haul mounting a moped.